Tag Archives: love

Forgiven… Not Excused

One of my weakest areas as a high school teacher was consistently disciplining students by the same standards day in and day out.  When I was in a good mood, I tended to be more patient, forgiving or overlooking acts I normally confronted or punished.  Meanwhile, if I was frustrated or irritated by a previous class, the wrath of Mr. Mankus came down in full force, kicking students out of class or sending several willing participants to after school detention.  In a sense, my goal was to communicate the message, “you’re forgiven, yet not excused for your behavior.

 

As a parent, this struggle has become more complicated as my kids have grown up and become too comfortable to their laid back dad.  Whenever I try to corral them toward a desired behavior, I receive sarcasm, creating a chain of laughter at my dinner table.  Discipline is like an art form which requires discernment, firmness and a set of values to abide by.  Bribing my children doesn’t work as well as it once was, spanking only worked when they were younger and yelling is too exhausting.  Although I am imperfect, all I can do is strive to live out Proverbs 22:6, proclaiming, “you’re forgiven by not excused from your actions.”

John 8:1-11 contains a woman whose hand in caught in the cookie jar of sin.  Before the days of judges and juries, the religious leaders were old school, taking action right away.  Interrupting Jesus’ teaching, the Pharisees were eager to apply the law of Moses, seeking the death penalty for the adulterer.  Thinking of his journey to the cross, Jesus turned his attention to perfection, looking for the guiltless to pick up the first stone.  Writing down the sins of the people in the crowd in the sand, the accusers leave one by one, dropping their rocks on their way home.  Although the crowd fled, Jesus didn’t let the woman off easy.  John 8:11 implies once you ask God for forgiveness, an act of contrition is necessary.  Jesus loves you just the way you are, but cares enough to move you beyond sin.  Therefore, the next time you receive forgiveness, God expects genuine repentance, turning 180 degrees toward Him, leaving sinful ways in the rear view mirror.

by Jay Mankus

Whole in One

I witnessed a hole in one for the first time as a caddy at Concord Country Club in Pennsylvania while in high school.  As a player, I came close several times, hitting the pin, lipping out and hanging on the edge of the cup without falling.  Finally, during my 10 year coaching career, I reached this dream during my team’s 4 day seeding tournament in 2006.  On the 3rd hole at Frog Hollow, a short par 3 playing about 135 yards, I hit a pitching wedge 3 days in a row.  Playing as a marker to insure no cheating took place, I hit the pin on one bounce, ricocheting 20 feet away during the first  round, making par.  On day 2, I hit a 3/4 wedge that landed just short, hula hooped around the hole, staying out, 2 feet away for an easy birdie.  The next day, I hit nearly the identical shot, but this one to my amazement dropped in for an ace.  The only draw back is I had to buy drinks, soda, for every member of my team and a few parent drivers.  Five years later, playing disc golf with all 3 of my children, I experienced another hole in one on the 18th hole at White Clay Creek State Park, buying slurpees for the family.

To be whole means to stay in one piece, unbroken or undamaged by people, obstacles or trials in life.  Synonyms of whole include complete, entire, intact and unabridged.  Though the thrill one receives from accomplishing a hole in one is exhilarating, this feeling quickly fades, especially when you hit your next bad shot.  On the day I had my one and only golf hole in one, I made double bogeys on 3 of the last 4 holes to shoot 40.  After a topsy-turvy round of golf, you get to start fresh with a brand new scorecard the next time you play.  Unfortunately, in life once you’ve become broken, scars remain deep within your soul.  These memories can haunt individuals like nightmares, serving as a barrier to prevent someone from becoming whole again.  When a sin or sins enters life as an impulse, one of the hardest things to do is to forgive yourself once you’ve indulged.  When the aftermath of 2 Samuel 11 is exposed by the prophet Nathan in 2 Samuel 12:1-17, King David had to pick of the pieces to his life and reputation.

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The words of Psalm 103:1-13 unveil a series of lessons God taught David on his journey to become whole again.  Beginning in verse 8, God’s nature is filled with compassion, grace and love.  Rather, than treat us as we deserve, God’s memory is erased of our wrong doing, fading into infinity.  All God asks is for those who seek his name is to fear Him, with reverence.  The apostle Paul shares a similar message in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, detailing the attributes of God, encapsulated by an agape love.  If you have tried on your own without success, like the woman in Matthew 9:20-22, cries out to Jesus, He is the only one who can make you whole.  Learn to let go like David did after committing adultery and murder, as you allow the giver of life to restore you back to where you belong, James 1:18, made whole in One God.

by Jay Mankus

Inconsistency’s and Irregularities in Life

In life, every day is not consistent, filled with irregularities which overshadow normal conditions.  When individuals expect a certain behavior from a co-worker or friend, based upon previous interactions, the ebb and flow of emotions inside the human soul can result in disappointment.  Instead, life is filled with unpredictable moments, where hearts and minds are swayed by evil to participate in illogical acts, Galatians 5:16-21.  These conflicting actions often create friction, like a wall of separation, Ephesians 4:26-27, leaving a trail of broken relationships, hurt feelings and lost trust in its aftermath.

Meanwhile, periods of love, joy and peace can be turned upside down by breaches in conventional thinking.  Right is confused with wrong, absolutes have become gray areas and morals are now equivalent to opinions, with truth no where to be found.  As a result, citizens have wandered off the straight and narrow path, Matthew 7:13-14, opting for crooked, twisted and unethical practices.  Thus, a generation of amoral people have been formed, misled by the inconsistency’s and irregularities of life.  This group are merely victims of society, like the Cretans of the Bible who were never shown a clear distinction between moral and immoral ways, Titus 3:1-11.

 
The words of James, Jesus’ half brother, serve as spiritual medicine to cure a sick mind.  James 1:2-7 speaks to times when the inconsistency’s and irregularities occur in life.  Perspective is crucial to staying optimistic during unexpected trials.  People with changed attitudes, transformed by a faith rooted in prayer, can stay afloat, regardless of how strong the winds of change blow.  Therefore, if you can learn to embrace life’s inconsistency’s and irregularities, God will fill you with perseverance to ride out each storm you encounter.  May God provide you with the wisdom you need to endure the whitecaps of life.

by Jay Mankus

I Really Mean It This Time

 
 If you have lived on earth long enough, then you’ve probably known or met someone who says one thing but does the complete opposite.  Everyone has flaws, yet some stick out more than others, especially when an individual earns a reputation for embellishing, exaggerating or lying.  Unfortunately, compulsive acts become like an addiction, like a second nature to someone who promises, “I really mean it this time.”

Pharaoh, king of Egypt appears to have developed this undesirable trait in Exodus 8:26-28.  In the midst of each plague sent by God, Pharaoh cried uncle, urging Moses to pray for him to remove the trial facing his empire.  However, as soon as each ceased, Pharaoh changed his mind as God continued to harden his heart, Exodus 9:33-35.  This pattern of sin went on for several weeks until Pharaoh finally refused to meet face to face with Moses anymore, Exodus 10:27-29.

 
If I was Moses, I would have given up on Pharaoh, realizing that trying to agree with him was a lost cause.  Some of you reading this may have a living co-worker, friend or relative who possess similar traits.  Whenever you face this real life scenario, all you can do is try to apply Jesus’ advice from Matthew 5:43-48.  Loving those who love you doesn’t require any effort.  Instead, God wants you to love and pray for those people who let you down time after time by saying, “I really mean it this time!”  Forgive others as Jesus has forgiven you, Colossians 3:13.

by Jay Mankus

I Can’t Help You With That

 The realist inside my heart has often led me to deviate from the script, persuaded by bored faces, uninterested glances and sleepy heads.  Perhaps, God has taught me that situations vary in life, different for each individual.  Thus, making a blanket remark or statement to anyone can be construed as inconsiderate, especially to a troubled soul.  Therefore, I have learned to be honest, saying to former students and peers, “I can’t help you with that” when I don’t know.

 

Unfortunately, Christians can come off cold as ice, unattached by responses like, “it must have been God’s will.”  When someone dies, gets diagnosed with a terminal illness or is left paralyzed by an accident, people need your love, prayers and support not a text book reply.  Maybe this is what the apostle Paul was eluding to in 1 Corinthians 13:1-3.  You can have the best personality, multiple talents and good intentions, yet without love you are nothing.

 

Pride is likely involved, puffing someone up in their minds until the frailty of life comes knocking at their door.  When roles are reversed, I wonder how this person will feel if a fellow believer serves up a patented quote from the Bible.  As Job endured heartbreak, trial and betrayal from his friends, Job 8:1-4, I can’t imagine the loneliness and pain he experienced.  If only someone stood up, broke from tradition and sincerely confessed, “I can’t help you with that, but God can!” – Luke 1:37

by Jay Mankus

Don’t Take It Personally

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In an ideal setting, everyone would love to be admired, cherished and highly valued.  However, in a fallen world, with individuals daily carrying around dirty laundry and excess baggage, receiving a desired response is unlikely.  Therefore, if an act of kindness, gentle reply or word of encouragement goes unnoticed, don’t take it personally.  According to Exodus 7:3, sometimes God will harden a person’s heart, preventing individuals from being civil.

When Jesus first sent off his disciples in Matthew 10, taking off their preverbal training wheels, he tries to prepare these 12 men for what to expect in life.  Beginning in Matthew 10:17-23, you could probably hear a pin drop, likely caught off guard by the hatred Jesus predicted.  Maybe this is where Judas Iscariot began to get cold feet, thinking to himself, “I didn’t sign up for this!”  I guess you can assume Jesus is trying to separate the followers from leaders, using a similar strong message in Luke 14:25-27 to narrow down his core group.

Unfortunately, the old saying of “sticks and stones will break my bones, but names will never hurt me” is a lie.  When I taught, I could have a dozen compliments from faculty and students, yet that one negative email from a parent is what I thought about, erasing all the good I received earlier in the day.  Criticism, harsh comments and tasteless remarks can get under your skin, leaving a heart torn in two.  When words feel like knife wounds, verbally poisoning your soul, take your burden to the Lord, Matthew 11:28.  May the words of Psalm 34:18-19 help you not to take future replies personally.

by Jay Mankus

To Hell With You

The other night at Bible Study, an impromptu discussion broke out about how hypocritical Christians can be.  In fact, every year people who are seeking God become turned off by churches, pastors and modern day Pharisees who care more about traditions than displaying the love of Jesus.  Instead of continuing their search, hurt people have decided to stay at home, finding other things to do on Sunday.

In business, there was a an old principle called the 3/10.  For every good experience an individual has, they will tell 3 other people.  However, whenever a customer encounters poor service, they reach out to 10 people, sharing their disappointment and frustrations.  Recently, a new ratio has replaced the 3/10 now known as the 11/4 principle, with the negative being the higher number.  Since first impressions often have lasting affects, if you’re not careful, someone might say, ” to hell with you and your religion!”

 

Unfortunately, the reality in life entices most people to get a little too comfortable, caught off guard by unknowing observers.  As a result, Christianity becomes less and less attractive to Americans due to the bad taste of judgmental believers.  In the end, something has to give, either the offended will give God another try or immature followers of Jesus will grow up by starting to resemble the son of God.  Whenever you are on the road of life, Matthew 7:13-14, may God nudge you back in the right direction.

by Jay Mankus

Roxanne

 

The song Roxanne was re-released by the Police in Europe after the band’s popularity gained some traction.  The lyrics of this song was inspired during a walk Sting took through the red light district while visiting Paris.  Initially, the band thought their manager Miles Copeland would not like this non-typical song, imagining what it would be like to fall in love with a prostitute.  As history unfolded, American listeners were introduced to Roxanne 4 years later through Police’s Synchronicity album in 1983.

 

Sting was not the only person intrigued by prostitutes as Matthew 9:9-13 conveys the audience Jesus concentrated on during his 3 year ministry.  Jesus recognized that the healthy and righteous did not need his help.  Thus, he spent his time outside of the disciples meeting with sinners like a divorced woman in John 4, another caught in adultery in John 8:1-11 and 2 different prostitutes named Mary.  Although his own disciples did not understand Jesus’ reason for accepting prostitutes like  John 12:1-8, he was a living example of compassion, forgiveness and love.

 

More than ever, there is a great disconnect within American culture.  People dress differently, pierce multiple body parts and express themselves like never before in our lifetime.  As a result, walls of prejudice, stereotypes and a wide range of beliefs have separated people before you even get to know them.  Like a prostitute, who get’s strange looks from observers, preconceived opinions prevent strangers from ever exchanging words.  May the love of Jesus, John 3:16-17, inspire individuals to display genuine concern like Sting to the Roxanne’s you encounter in life.

by Jay Mankus

Good Grief Charlie Brown

Beginning in the early1950’s, the Peanuts Comic Strip became a main stay in American newspapers.  As the popularity of Charles Schultz’s creation grew, television brought this animation to life in the 1960’s, known as the golden era of Peanuts.  By the 1980’s, holidays and Charlie Brown specials became an annual tradition  for families.  This is where children first saw Lucy pull back a football that Charlie Brown was about to kick, causing him to fall to the ground in anguish.  Thus, the expression, “Good grief Charlie Brown” was born.

Today, there is a different kind of pain parent’s experience.  Unrelated to sports, this infliction is derived when their own children begin to date individuals who have a questionable reputation.  Despite their initial warning, teenagers have a mind of their own, often neglecting the advice of mom or dad.  Blinded by love, lust or self-fulfillment, most proceed into a relationship, doing whatever it takes to love or be loved.  In many cases, a person blends into this new environment, compromising who they are and want to be.  As a result, I can hear adults mutter, “Good grief, Charlie Brown!”

According to Genesis 26:34-35, Esau’s choice in a wife, Judith the Hittite caused Isaac and Rebekah great distress.  Instead of seeking someone with a similar beliefs, standards,  and values, Esau goes outside of God’s family.  Although her physical appearance is not mentioned, its likely that Esau choose external features over character.  Like distant relatives, Esau’s decision to marry a Hittite leads him away from God’s favor, corrupted by a nation full of idols.  Once stuck in this relationship, the only barometer left was his conscience, “good grief Esau!”  Unfortunately, its too late for those who are gone, dead and buried.  Yet, for those of you still clinging to life, break free of sin’s chains so that you will bring peace and not grief to your family.

by Jay Mankus

Snuffing Out Life

One of the largest and longest snakes known to exist on earth is the anaconda.  Native to the tropics of South America, some of these species have been discovered in the Florida Everglades over the last decade according to Animal Planet.  Similar to a reticulated python, this non-venomous snake uses its teeth to hold on before squeezing its victim to death.  The power of this beast essentially snuffs out the life of its prey through suffocation.

Lucifer or Satan is portrayed as a crafty serpent in Genesis 3:1 and Revelation 12:9.  However, the ruler of the air, Ephesians 2:2, known as the devil, only has one of his demons referenced in the New Testament.  While the term legion is used by John Mark in Mark 5:9 in context with a demon possessed man, the word actually refers to a number, commonly used by Roman military leaders.  This leaves Acts 16:16 as the only place an individual demon is named.  The King James version uses the phrase “spirit of python,” translated into most modern translations as a spirit of divination or foretelling the future.

The thought of money had blinded this girl’s owners from the internal struggle within her soul.  Upon seeing Paul in Acts 16:16-18, she cries out for help, a last ditch effort before having any chances of a spiritual life snuffed out.  Entangled by the grips of a demon, Paul saves her life while endangering his own.  The devil poisoned the minds of these greedy owners, convincing the towns people to place Paul, Silas and Luke in prison.  Immediately following one victory, Acts 16:19-24, Satan tries to squeeze out of the love of Jesus from these men.

Today, the devil is up to his usual tricks, using defeat, failure and trials to suck the life out of individuals.  John 10:10 isn’t just something written over 2,000 years ago that no longer applies.  Rather, every day is a spiritual war, a battle that won’t end until heaven and earth pass away.  Therefore, if you feel the presence of depression, stress or worry begin to wrap around your neck, use prayer to put on the full armor of God, Ephesians 6:13-18.  Fight fire with spiritual fire, 1 Timothy 6:12, to avoid having your life snuffed out prematurely.

by Jay Mankus