Hindsight is defined as the understanding of a situation or event only after it has developed or happened. For the past two years, a large cataract hindered my ability to see out of my right eye. While I experienced periods of improvement, last summer my eye doctor suggested it’s time to deal with this situation. As I struggled to read fine print, I came to the same conclusion, scheduling a surgery for late November. A series of unforeseen events forced this operation to be postponed until last Thursday.
Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved, for you are my praise, Jeremiah 17:14.
Like any procedure, I was afraid, not knowing the ultimate outcome. Before I was given drugs to numb the pain, I made my peace with God. When the nurse at the front desk asked me for my will and testament prior to being admitted, worst case scenarios raced through my mind. This request likely elevated my blood pressure so high that my first operation was cancelled. As a person of faith, I wrestle with relying on medicine to resolve health problems. However, when changes in diet, fasting and prayer does not improve your condition, my operation served as a last resort. While the healing process takes roughly two weeks, only time will tell if my sight will be fully restored.
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand, Isaiah 41:10.
I feel like the prophet Isaiah is speaking to me in the passage above. I have no control over how well eye will recover. Sure, I can listen to my doctor’s directions by taking my daily prescriptions, but the degree of healing is in God’s hand. My dream of writing screen plays is dependent upon the final outcome of my cataract surgery. Thus, all I can do is place my trust in the Lord, believing that God will help improve my condition. Although I am not considering this trial a pure joy as James 1:2-4 suggests, I am relying on hindsight, remembering how God has provided for me in the past.
by Jay Mankus