Tag Archives: marriage

Tasting But Not Believing

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oyAKevE9EVk

Every once in a while individuals will eat something that doesn’t sit well.  Certain drinks or foods will leave a bad after taste.  Other combinations can result in bad breath, heart burn and stomach cramps.  If you are trying to win a friend over to your favorite restaurant, sometimes tasting is not believing.

It is impossible for those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, who have shared in the Holy Spirit, who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the coming age and who have fallen away, to be brought back to repentance. To their loss they are crucifying the Son of God all over again and subjecting him to public disgrace, Hebrews 6:4-6.

Human nature causes individuals to encounter several phases over the course of one’s life.  Whether its curiosity, emotion or peer pressure, the hesitant will put their toes in the water first to see if they want to dive in or not.  The author of Hebrews warns first century citizens about applying this same principle to Christianity.  Unfortunately, a let me try it for a while to see if I like it mentality cause many souls every year to abandon their faith.

Some people are like seed along the path, where the word is sown. As soon as they hear it, Satan comes and takes away the word that was sown in them, Mark 4:15.

This mindset has filtered down into many traditions like dating, marriage and sex.  The world uses a car buyer analogy, wanting to test drive something before they purchase it to justify living together before getting married and premarital sex.  Perhaps this is want Jesus was referring to in Mark 4:15, warning souls against walking by sight instead of by faith.  In life it only takes one moment of compromise before temptation leads you to taste forbidden fruit.  If this behavior develops into a pattern, your life may be summarized by tasting but not believing.

by Jay Mankus

 

 

Sitting on the Sidelines or Fighting to the End?

Take, take, take.  A common theme in an ever increasing selfish world.  When communities, churches or marriages begin to fall apart, most sit along the sideline watching the situation deteriorate.  Meanwhile, few have the strength to fight to the very end.

As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace, 1 Peter 4:10.

From 2010 through the present, I’ve witnessed two special relationships end.  The first was a special church family that I became entrenched in, serving as an elder for six years and teacher for another ten years at its adjacent high school.  While many abandoned Red Lion as it first started to take on water, I tried my best to do what I could.  Although, I probably should have been more outspoken initially, the odds were stacked against me.  In the end, the church closed its doors and the school was sold to another denomination, causing several colleagues, including myself to lose their job.

It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many, Matthew 20:26-28.

The second divorce began as the first became final.  The baseball league that my sons played in under went a similar myriad of trials.  Trying to prevent an identical ending, I spent two years investing my time in the youth of Greater Newark.  Like a M.A.S.H. unit, the efforts I provided extended the life of the league for a couple of years.  Stepping aside to allow the next generation of parents to lead, most have passed the buck, unwilling to save this sinking organization.  While GNBL’s future is bleak, my only question is who will get off their butt, move beyond the sidelines and fight to the very end?

by Jay Mankus

Rocky Road

On the way to see the wizard, Dorothy, Toto and the cast of misfits she picked up on the way to Oz didn’t always have a smooth journey.  The scarecrow, tinman and lion all had major flaws, but the company they provided on the yellow brick road was worth the risk.  Alone, Dorothy would have not been able to overcome the rocky road that the wicked witch brought forth.  Together, working as a team this motley crew, defeated the enemy, setting the witches servants free.

In life, I wish you could travel from point A to point B without any obstacles.  However, each day has its own set of detours, pot holes and road blocks.  One day you have a teaching job, the next day you don’t.  Others have seen marriage vanish before their eyes.  Meanwhile,  accidents, tragedy and illness ends the life of some way too soon.  Essentially, life is a rocky road with twists and turns that no one other than God can foresee.

Subsequently, the Bible warns its readers of the nightmares that greet individuals, James 1:2-4.  Although some suffer more than others, trials come in various shape and sizes.  Perhaps, as unfortunate events enter one’s life, faith and trust increases, forcing believers to climb, crawl or walk along a narrowing path, Matthew 7:14.  Looking back over the past 5 years, I thank God for the rocky road that I’ve endured.  As a disciple once said, “sometimes you have to go through fire to be refined for future endeavors,” 1 Peter 1:6-7.  May the rocky roads that you’ve encountered prepare you for future blessings in God’s time, Ecclesiastes 3:11

by Jay Mankus

Waking Up Fat

For the first 18 years of my life, I was a lean, mean running machine, never weighing more than 140 pounds.  In college, I grew out, gaining the freshman 25, then bulked up by working out several days a week.  By the time I married, I leveled out at 180 pounds, exercising a few times each week to stay in shape.  After being chased by stray dogs for several miles on consecutive days, I decided to retire from jogging.  Subsequently, as time passed, one day I woke up fat.

When you stand and look at yourself in a mirror, its only uplifting if you’re in shape.  Unfortunately, countless individuals have developed 6 packs, cases or keg shaped bellies.  Some where along the way as your metabolism slows down, all it takes is poor eating habits or consuming too many calories by drinking beverages to become bloated.  Once you reach this point, you only have 2 real choices, make drastic changes or accept your obesity.

Although millions are annually concerned with their physical weight, people can also become spiritually obese.  Usually, this process begins with an innocent break from God.  “I’m not going to go to church this weekend?  I’m too tired to read my Bible.  I just don’t feel like praying today; nor do I know what to say to God anyway.”  Often, one day becomes a week, weeks turn into months and before you know, you haven’t talked to God in years.  If you find yourself here, remember the words of  1 Timothy 4:8.  Put Jesus’ words from Matthew 7:24 into practice or else you might become like me, waking up fat.

by Jay Mankus

 

A Pedestal of Disappointment

There are certain individuals which possess gravitas, tempting family, friends and followers to place them up on a pedestal.  These dynamics personalities make it hard not to jump on the bandwagon as some become held in high regards as a cultural hero.  However, when you choose to place someone up on a pedestal, its a matter of time before you will experience disappointment.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHgcHfc6z9Q

According to Romans 3:23, no one is perfect.  Regardless of your efforts and motives, sooner or later will you fail, mess up or make a mistake.  This blunder often shatters the image of your fans, causing many to jump ship.  In the aftermath of sin, its difficult to come with terms with the failures of leaders.  The painful reality of this disappointment will make you think twice before placing another treasured soul on a pedestal.

The relational aspect of life makes people vulnerable to pain.  Perhaps, a growing number of adults are forgoing marriage to avoid the heartbreak of unfilled vows.  While you may believe this is a good idea, there is only One who is worth placing up on a pedestal, Hebrews 4:14-16.  Don’t blame the creator for imperfect people.  Rather, lift up the only One who is worthy to be praised, Romans 5:8.

by Jay Mankus

 

After the Pain Subsides

Some psychologists often suggest pain is a way of life.  Infants battle teething, youth struggle with puberty, teens endure broken relationships and adults face failed marriages.  How you handle this pain influences whether or not you’ll reach the goals you aspire to achieve in life.  After the pain subsides, who will be left standing?

Trials, tribulations and unexpected setbacks are difficult to overcome.  In fact, a weak mind may begin to accept defeat, allowing a season of disappointment to alter their expectations.  This demise lowers the bar so low, that there’s not much to celebrate.  Thus, one becomes like the wind, blowing to and fro trying to make it through each day, dead inside.  However, a time is coming when the sun will rise after the pain subsides.

Perhaps, this is the emotion, feeling and peace a weeping man experiences in Lamentations 3:22-23.  Despite his current condition, a glimmer of hope arises from one of God’s promises, bringing a sense of relief.  Like a cold Alaskan winter, the sun stands on the horizon all summer long to help forget the memory of the bitter cold.  As you try to resist the pain of life, may the words of the Bible offer a sweet pill of truth to get you through the present until your pain subsides.

by Jay Mankus

P.A.I.N.

As I was struggling to fall asleep, the following acronym popped into my head: Previous Accidents Impacting Nerves.  With 2 broken ribs, a lacerated liver and lungs still not functioning as they should, pain is something I must overcome if I want my health to be restored fully.   Unfortunately, pain often influences individuals in a negative manner, leading to changed attitudes, behavior and unhealthy patterns.

For instance, once a solider completes his or her tour of duty, no one fully understands the hell they endured except for their squadron or team.  Thus, when the John Rambo’s of America’s armed services return home, fitting in takes time and for some, adjusting to the spoiled brats of today’s culture never happens.  Nightmares depict a living video game, without a happy ending or reset button to start life over.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKSKcGSAuXY

Meanwhile, pain is something a husband and wife can never fully grasp once a decision to divorce fatally wounds the souls of their children.  Blaming themselves, many youth across this country cry themselves to sleep, praying that mom and dad will change their mind.  The unborn child doesn’t receive a voice, discarded in dumpsters daily as mothers can only think of what could have been.  Pain is not a pleasant topic to address, yet without tackling these issues people of faith won’t learn to endure hardship as they should, 2 Timothy 2:3-5.  As previous accidents impact your own nerves, come to Jesus for relief, nurturing your soul as you cope with these ongoing pains, Matthew 11:28-30.

by Jay Mankus

A Place That Will Change Your Life Forever

On earth, travel agencies will try to convince clients of a sweet deal, hidden gem or destination that will change your life.  As spring approaches, television commercials will display eye popping images as states hope your summer plans include a family vacation to one their resorts.  While memories can be forever etched into your mind, the thought of work quickly snaps individuals back to reality, ending any memorable getaway.

From a spiritual perspective, people may recall the place they got baptized, the church they were married in or a retreat center where they met God for the first time.  Inside a sanctuary, family’s tend to gravitate toward their favorite pew, stare at magnificent stain glass windows or recall taking their first communion.  According to Exodus 29:37, the altar made for the Tent of Meeting possessed supernatural powers, making those priests who touched it holy.  While not the Tent of Meeting, the altar at a church in Friendship, Maryland changed my life forever.

During my senior year of college, I was asked to serve on a Lay Witness Mission team for a church seeking to revive its congregation.  My role was to be a small group leader for the youth group and its college students, sharing how God had made a difference in my life.  Usually, one of the leaders was asked to share part of their faith journey, a snapshot of their life.  On Saturday night, our leader Ken told me that I would be speaking to the entire congregation Sunday morning.  Caught off guard, my initial instinct was fear, pondering, “how can someone who stutters speak for 15 minutes?”

Subsequently, I was led to pray, asking the Holy Spirit and my roommate to clue me in on what God wanted me to say to several hundred strangers.  Tossing and turning, I was reminded of a song that I brought, called The Altar.  Studying the lyrics in my mind, a vision for my first sermon was conceived, drifting me off into a peaceful sleep.  As I made my closing remarks, I gave an altar call, inviting anyone who was touched by the Holy Spirit to come to the altar while I played Ray Boltz’s song.

To my amazement, one college student literally ran to the altar as soon as the song began.  Others quickly, followed, filling up the semi-circle shaped altar in front of the pulpit.  When the music ended, people were standing in line, waiting to kneel at the altar.  Elders and leaders of the church began to lay hands on those crying, quietly whispering words up to heaven on their behalf.  As I joined the congregation following my message, the senior pastor shared a few words, summarizing these amazing events of this 3 day event, encouraging people to continue lay their burdens up to Jesus at the altar, Matthew 11:28.  On earth, there are countless wonders of the world, but for me, I will never forget this day when lives were changed forever at the altar.

by Jay Mankus

An Anniversary Day Prayer

Eight teen years ago today, I took the plunge, walking down the altar to a new life with my wife Leanne.  Three kids, two states and  one adventure after another has etched fond memories of the past two decades together.  With marriages, relationships and vows not lasting as long as they once did, an anniversary day prayer is necessary to keep the flame of love alive.

As Adam learned eons ago, Genesis 2:20-24, finding a suitable helper isn’t easy.  Maybe this is one of the reasons why King Solomon continued to seek wife after wife according to 1 Kings 11:1-3.  Unfortunately, even one of the wisest men to ever walk the face of the earth forgot to consider how being unequally yoked would influence his own relationship with God, 2 Corinthians 6:14-15.  All you have to do is read Proverbs 19:13 and 21:9 to understand Solomon’s regrets about rushing into marriage.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDe0OjjPLbs

With this in mind, I am thankful for waiting, watching and trusting God to provide a godly spouse.  Although each of us have our own imperfections, the Lord has guided our steps together as a couple, Galatians 5:25.  Whatever the future holds, I am grateful to a loving wife, 3 great kids and daily bread.  Prayer is what has held my family together, offering up loved ones to God and asking angels to keep watch when you are not around.  In the end, one of my favorite prayers is for God give me the wisdom of Solomon, the love of Jesus and  the favor of Joseph from Genesis.    May you find the same joy and peace that I have experienced over the last 18 years.

by Jay Mankus

Saving the Best for Now

Attending weddings are often a family affair, seeing relatives that you’ve only heard stories of or seeing others you haven’t seen for years.  Whether you are on the bride or groom side, marriage is meant to publicly celebrate the union between a husband and a wife, where two individuals become one flesh, Matthew 19:4-6.  Although not mentioned in John 2:1-11, the rabbi overseeing the proceeding likely quotes Genesis 2:24 during the vows portion of the wedding in Cana that Jesus and his family attended.

Based upon the accounts in chapter 1, only 6 disciples had been selected by Jesus, with 6 more to complete his ministry team.  This passage also suggests Joseph, Mary’s husband and Jesus’ earthly father had been dead for sometime.  The final piece of the puzzle insinuates that Mary is a close acquaintance to the parents of the bride as she is concerned about how her friend would be perceived if they ran out of wine at the reception, with some carrying on for 3-4 days.  If this is true, these elements help explain Jesus’ comment, “my time has not yet come,” Joseph’s absence from the text and Mary’s anxious reply to her son.  An observer to all of these occurrences is James, the author of the Catholic Letter and younger brother of Jesus.

Although his earthly ministry was not suppose to start yet, Jesus felt compelled to obey 5th commandment, Exodus 20:12, “honor your father and mother.”  The perfect child, Jesus calls the servants at the party to listen to his instructions, John 2:6-8.  Knowing the miracle had been done from a distance, Jesus orders the master of the banquet to receive a cup from one of the 6 stone jars, filled with water.  Remaining in the background, Jesus allows the bridegroom to take credit for the choice wine created by the son of God.  The master of the banquet refers to his sip as, “saving the best til now!”

An eyewitness of this miracle, James probably never forgot what his oldest brother had done, a special memory etched in his mind.  Perhaps James 4:13-17 is a small glimpse of the lesson God taught him in Cana.  You may love your past or can’t wait for a future event, but all that matters is the here and now.  Therefore, don’t worry about what could of or should have been and avoid the temptation of what may be.  Rather, live out Colossians 3:17 today as you save the best for now!

by Jay Mankus