Author Archives: expressyourself4him
Beneath the Surface of a Liar
Turning Depression Into Inspiration
Depression is not an isolated feeling, often brought on by broken promises, failed expectations or shattered dreams. The byproducts of depression can affect your soul as despair, hopelessness and misery hover over your life like a stationary weather system. As dejection lingers, this decline in your mood can lead to “a woe is me, nobody loves me; everybody hates me attitude.” The past few weeks have been extremely difficult for me, causing me to regress socially, slumping into a state of gloominess. In this saddened mindset, the Lord gave me a glimpse of sunshine with a thought, turn your depression into inspiration.
The outline for this in found in Psalm 32. David had just been rebuked by the prophet Nathan in 2 Samuel 12:1-10, forced to come clean about committing adultery and second degree murder. David’s depression is indirectly referenced in Psalm 32:3-4, draining the energy out of him. Guilt, regret and spiritual conviction ate away at David’s heart until he was honest with God about what he had done. James 5:16 further illustrates the healing power of publicly confessing your sin. After releasing his feelings at the altar of the Lord, David’s expression suddenly changes from himself to others, then to God’s deliverance. Finally, David’s depression was transformed into inspiration in Psalm 32:11. “Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous; sing, all you who are upright in heart.”
Those that know me in a social setting understand that I am a realist. When I sin, the last thing I think about is rejoicing in the Lord. However, despite of all of David’s own flaws, his heart was in the right place, 1 Samuel 16:7. Thus, in my weakened state, I must remember the apostle Paul’s prayer in 2 Corinthians 12:9-12. When you surrender the reigns of your life and let God take control, it is through Christ’s power that turns depression into inspiration to achieve the abundant life, John 10:10.
by Jay Mankus
The Running Experience
From the fall of 1983 through the spring of 1993, I logged several thousand miles training for the cross country season, competing in dual meets, running in large invitationals and staying in shape through road races. My initial experience began as a I ran from cars I threw snow balls at, fleeing the scene of houses I just toilet papered and sprinting from the authorities trying to access road signs for our high school display case. In elementary school, Physical Fitness Week introduced me to the 50 yard dash, the 3rd fastest in my grade at Harlan Elementary, in inner city Wilmington. During my 2 years at Hanby Junior High, gym classes forced students to run a timed mile and 2 mile once a year on our school’s track. By the end of 8th grade, I ran a 6:20 mile and just broke 13 minutes for 2 miles.
However, there is so much more to the running experience than meets the eye. First, running is a way you can channel your energy. Like Bo Jackson in the ESPN 30 for 30 Presentation entitled, “You Don’t Know Bo, each of us used sports as a vessel to express ourselves to overcome stuttering. In college, I would frequently take study breaks by running 3 miles to clear my mind from all the stress and worries of life. Afterward, I was awake, fresh and ready to tarry on until my work was complete.
Running is also a spiritual encounter, a time you can use listening to God. While running with a Sony Walkman in one hand, God’s voice always seemed clearer when I ran consistently for a decade. Maybe this is why the apostle Paul uses so many metaphors in correlation with running in the Bible. Hebrews 12:1-3 illustrates why people should run and 1 Corinthians 9:24-25 details how we should run. Some of the most intimate times I have ever had with God have been running alone at night, getting in touch with myself and communing with the Holy Spirit.
Finally, running teaches you the values of dedication, hard work and perseverance, 1 Timothy 4:8. Running isn’t easy nor is it a natural desire for most people. Although, once you stick with it for a few years, you cross a threshold which actually brings joy to your life each time you run. I stopped running for good in 1996, when stray dogs from our neighbor constantly chased me for miles. Since I had nothing to aim or shoot for, a lack of cartilage in both my knees made my decision easy. Today, I am semi-retired from running, only training with my 2 boys during the summer to prepare them for their cross country season. Yet, I still practice Paul’s mental challenge in 1 Corinthians 9:27 as I continue my running experience with Christ.
by Jay Mankus
Personal Records
4:52 mile at Brandywine Creek State Park
10:20 2 mile also at Brandywine during the same cross country race
16:30 3 mile in the foothills north of Baltimore Maryland
16:53 5K (3.1 miles) at Delcastle Recreation Center
29:52 5 miles at Bellevue State Park as a 10th grader before my ankle surgery
Deja Vu
This morning I awoke to an awkward feeling’, like I am reliving 2001 all over again. Unlike Bill Murray in Groundhog Day, my life has become synonymous with the classic Yes song Roundabout written by Jon Anderson and Steven James Howe. Instead of going on vacation to a lake in the mountains, I have completed a 12 year cycle which has brought me back to where I was in 2001.
The eerie sensation known as deja vu has been attributed to the paranormal, neurological disorders and our own understanding of human recognition memory. From a psychological perspective, the brain fluctuates between 2 different types of recognition memory: recollection and familiarity. When our mind processes the here and now, it can trigger emotions from previous times in our past, identical or similar to what we are currently undergoing. Thereby, producing the phenomena deja vu.
I believe people are born to do certain occupations and professions in life before they die. Like Doc Graham in the movie Field of Dreams, if he decided to play professional baseball his entire life, he would have never impacted people like he did as a doctor. In the same way, God has made it painfully clear in 2012 that God has designed me to be a teacher. The events of 9/1/01 paved the way for me to become a Bible teacher for a decade. Now I am waiting to be rescued from a pile of debt, shattered dreams and a wounded heart.
Emergency workers, fighter fighters and police who laid down their lives on that fateful day, ran into the World Trade Center as others were fleeing the scene to save as many people as humanly possible. Likewise, as Jesus’ disciples tried to fight for his life in Matthew 26:51, Jesus surrendered, laying down his life as a ransom to pay for my sin, Matthew 20:28. Although I may not be where I feel called at this moment in time, God can, has and will lead me to where I need to be.
by Jay Mankus
Abandon Ship, Abandon Ship
Edward Smith, Captain of the Titanic said, “I never saw a wreck and never have been wrecked, nor was I ever in any predicament that threatened to end in disaster.” These famous last words illustrate why the apostle Paul warned people about being over confident in 1 Corinthians 10:12. Unfortunately, Vince Young, former backup quarterback of the Philadelphia Eagles didn’t learn from history calling the 2011 Eagles the next “dream team,” ending in a nightmare at 8-8. Starting quarterback Michael Vick revised this statement with one of his own, calling the 2012 Eagles “a dynasty.” After 8 straight loses following a 3-1 start to this NFL season, at 3-9 its time to abandon ship.
The word hype means to advertise, build up, excite and publicly tout. If a professional athlete wants to get on ESPN, they will celebrate excessively or show boat to draw attention to themselves hoping to make Sports Center. Meanwhile, if a journalist wants national exposure, he or she will try to write something controversial so that people will talk about their piece around the water cooler at work. This probably explains why writers of the 1997 film Titanic include a scene with Leonardo DiCaprio standing up on top of the forward bow, yelling, “I’m king of the world!” Instead of jumping ship, our culture has abandoned humility.
Gone are the days of acting like you have been there, handing the ball to the official after scoring a touchdown in football. Or simply running around the bases following a home run in baseball. Meanwhile, narcissists are running rampant in society, likely due to a lack of discipline, parenting and the rod of correction, Proverbs 13:24. Either way you slice it, people are abandoning the principles of the Magna Carta. Europeans came to this country on ships to fulfill the great commission, Mark 16:15-16, by spreading the gospel to the new world. Today, revisionists are erasing Christ from our history books as we now live in the Common Era.
As the ship called America is sinking, I am optimistic that Captain Jesus can save us from a sea of despair. However, its not a bad idea to put on the life vest of salvation, 1 Thessalonians 5:8-9. When the upcoming financial cliff approaches, be prepared for the worst, 1 Peter 1:3-7 so that through this adventure your faith will be refined for the next ice berg. As for now, slow speed ahead with your eyes on the prize, Philippians 3:20-21!
by Jay Mankus
Right In Front of You
In the movie Bruce Almighty, Jim Carrey plays Bruce Nolan, a television reporter in Buffalo, New York. Like many Americans, Bruce begins to blame God for the problems he is experiencing in life. Thinking he has been dealt a bad hand in life, Bruce believes he can do a better job than God Almighty. God, played by Morgan Freeman, responds by endowing Bruce with divine powers. Until you switch places with another person or in this case God, you don’t realize that sometimes the answers to your prayers are right in front of you.
This is a lesson I learned yesterday. When I use Psalm 5:3 as a model for prayer, I often expect God to answer me in my way or on my terms. However, prayer is not like going to the check out counter after finding the Christmas presents you want. Rather, prayer also involves listening, at times meditating on scripture and waiting in expectation of answers. Yet, human nature has blinded me from the blessings, gifts and rewards God has already bestowed upon my family. When the veil covering my eyes was released last night, two Christian co-workers were right in front of me, a clear answer to my prayers.
Most people dream of winning the lottery, thinking about all the good they could do with the money. Thus, one day Bruce Nolan answered the people’s prayers, having millions of Americans win, splitting $3.33. In response, people were angry with God because their own expectations were not fulfilled. This leads me back to modern day, in a sputtering economy, with joblessness and not enough money to afford the littlest of gifts. Free will enables each person to act as they wish like Bruce Nolan in the movie. However, in this Christmas season please don’t overlook the good tidings, given from above, James 1:17, that are right in front of you!
by Jay Mankus
The Days That Music Died
In his prime, Buddy Holly produced some of the most distinctive and influential rock music of the 1950’s. Inspired by Elvis Presley, Buddy Holly went from playing at a local roller skating rink in Lubbock, Texas to the top of the billboard charts. Songs like Peggy Sue and That’ll Be The Day led to his stardom until a 1959 plane crash ended his life before reaching his 23rd birthday. American folk star Don McLean was so touched by this tragedy he wrote the song American Pie in 1971 recounting the day music died in this disaster.
Music was reborn 10 years later on August 1st, 1981 as Music Television first aired in New York City. As cable television went national in the early 1980’s, the art of music was brought back to life through on stage interviews, behind the scenes programs on upcoming album releases and the creation of music videos. During my junior high days, I went to a friends every day after school until 5pm so I could be informed on my favorite groups and their new songs. This was musics second hey day, spawning an entire generation, yet this too would come to pass.
While artists come and go, dying of natural and unnatural causes, the second death of music is more subtle. Some where in the past 30 years, music has been corrupted by sex appeal. In an attempt to hold an audiences’ attention, music videos continue to push the envelope, developing more into a 3-4 minute adult film than a music video. Although must consumers download songs from places like itunes, album covers still exist. Instead of a pissing contest, female musicians appear to be competing in a beauty pageant, seeing who can reveal more of their body without being accused of pornography.
Yes, music in America is on life support, waiting for the next Buddy Holly to rescue it. While Super Bowl half time shows will continue, we need a true leader to arise, saying enough is enough with these wardrobe malfunctions. Doesn’t any artist have some integrity or guts to save lyrics from sexual immorality? God is waiting, like in the days of Ezekiel, for someone to stand in the gap of morality, Ezekiel 22:30. In the words of M.C. Hammer, Pray!
by Jay Mankus
song writer of A Simple Confession, 1994
What Causes Someone to Pull the Trigger?
In light of the recent murder of Kasandra M. Perkins and subsequent suicide of Kansas City Chiefs linebacker Jovan Belcher, its important to learn from this tragedy. If our culture continues to make the same mishaps without gathering information from history, we won’t survive. Thus, it is vital to begin to grasp what causes someone who appears normal to pull the trigger.
To uncover this mystery, we must go back 8,000 years to study the first murder ever recorded. Cain was a farmer, like his father Adam, a difficult occupation due to the curse placed on the ground by God in Genesis 3:17-19. Taking this into account, Abel, Cain’s younger brother, decides he doesn’t want to stay in the family business, opting to pursue a career as a shepherd. Not dependent on the soil, Abel thrives, moving his sheep from field to field once the are grasslands depleted. This success leads Abel to easily give his first fruits back to God while older brother Cain struggles to make ends meat. These events create a spirit of jealousy within Cain’s heart, frustrated by blessings Abel receives, Genesis 4:4-7.
Now that we have a motive for murder, one must delve into the words of Jesus, investigating the Sermon on the Mount to probe for more clues why someone might pull the trigger. In Matthew 5, Jesus is trying to put Old Testament laws, mainly the 10 Commandments into modern terms. Jesus isn’t attempting to change these commands. Rather, He is putting them into laymen terms so that everyone in attendance understands.
According to Matthew 5:21-22, Jesus equates hatred with murder. A normal person is not going to pull the trigger, killing someone. However, when a person allows hatred to enter their heart and dwell there, murder is conceived. Like the conservation with Cain in Genesis 4:6-7, God was trying to talk him out of acting upon his hatred of Abel. The expression “sin is crouching at your door” is a Babylonian term used to refer to an evil demon trying to enter a building, threatening to harm those inside. In other words, the second stage to pulling the triggers involves demonic influences which sows seeds of murder within someone’s mind.
Yet, Jesus does not stop here; there is one more step which pushes people over the cliff of normalcy to insanity. Although the context of Matthew 5:27-30 is adultery, Jesus is addressing the Old Testament practice of purging. If an alcoholic wants to quit drinking, but lives next door to a liquor store, he must move to purge his desire to drink. Likewise, if someone embraces unwholesome lusts, you have to take drastic steps to regain control of your body, Matthew 5:29-30. People who commit suicide and or murder are enslaved by these desires, crossing the point of no return like Cain, James 1:13-15.
I don’t claim to be an expert on murder or suicide, but I do believe all the answers to life can be found in the Bible. You may not have all your questions answered in this life, yet you can make reservations for the next life, John 3:16-17. In fact, John, the one whom Jesus loved, who knew Jesus better than anyone else on earth, leaves everyone an amazing promise in 1 John 5:13. Make a date with God today, Romans 10:9-10, before its too late to act!
by Jay Mankus
A Study of the Word
Stop The Non-Sense
When I attended the University of Delaware, I experienced another world. Though I wasted my first semester chasing after an Animal House like happening, it wasn’t long until I had to face reality; the party life wasn’t for me. I had to stay true to my convictions, accept my relational weaknesses and stop being fake. Its no wonder that the disciple Peter uses the expression sober in 1 Peter 4:7, calling people to be real by stopping the non-sense mentioned in verses 3-6.
Unfortunately, many college students never leave their drunken stupor, carrying it over into adulthood. Meanwhile, people are in denial of life’s end, thinking everyone will go to heaven, no matter what they have done in life. While its true heaven is not solely dependent upon what you do, Ephesians 2:8, faith does require action, James 2:26. James, the brother of Jesus, lived amongst the son of God without ever believing in him. It took a painful death, burial and subsequent resurrection of Jesus for James’ faith to come alive. James 2:14-26 is a clear proclamation to stop the non-sense by aligning your deeds with your faith.
I was saddened to hear about Kansas City Chief’s player Jovan Belcher killing his girlfriend, driving to their practice facility, then shooting himself to death in front of head coach Romeo Crennel and general manager Scott Pioli. The only comparable thing I can remember from my own life is when a foreign exchange students from Japan committed suicide by walking into the path of a on coming train after her parents disowned her for becoming a Christian during her last semester of college. Whether you like it or not, death forces individuals to think of the after life, heaven or hell. You can’t sugarcoat this fact from the Bible, Matthew 7:13-14, with more going down instead of up if you take the Bible literally.
Though some churches claim murder is an unforgivable sin, this is not biblical; only blasphemy of the Holy Spirit is not forgiven according to Jesus in Matthew 12:31. This too is often confused, especially with youtubes comparing denying God with blasphemy. In the end, only God knows your heart. However, people have to stop lying to themselves and open their eyes to what is truly going on around them. Listen closely to the language daily spoken. What are the majority of television commercials really selling? How many laws are being broken by these new reality shows? Wake up America while you are still alive! Remove the garbage you are daily digesting, come to your senses like the prodigal son in Luke 15:17-18 and embrace your heavenly father who loves and created you. In light of this latest tragedy, the sensible thing to do is to prepare yourself for the after life, 1 Peter 4:8-11.
by Jay Mankus
Pray for the Chiefs, the families affected and for those who have not made their eternal reservations, 1 John 5:13.
More Power
As I was watching a rerun of Crimson Tide today, I am reminded of the impact Star Trek has had on Generation X. Denzel Washington uses a famous line from this series to inspire Vossler, an electronic specialist, to regain radio transmission of their sub as soon as possible to avert a nuclear war. Whenever Captain Kirk, played by William Shatner in Star Trek, felt the U.S.S. Enterprise was in danger, he would contact Scottie, asking for more power to engage warp speed to dodge trouble.
Since I have spent the last 6 days working the night shift, I have been in warp speed mode. During this fast paced week, I have been lethargic, lacking the spiritual power I need to remain rock solid in my faith. While the Bible was only a few steps away, my body seemed paralyzed, unable to reach out, open the Word up and begin reading. Meanwhile, prayer was just a breath away, but my transmission between God and I failed. Thus, I am in desperate need of an infusion, like the Jeff Deyo song More Love, More Power.
The former lead singer of Sonic Flood, Jeff Deyo reveals that more power is available through worshiping the Lord Jesus Christ. According to Psalm 149, praise has a generating effect on our body, sparking dancing, rejoicing and singing. When you initiate a relationship with Jesus, Romans 10:9-10, the power of the Holy Spirit produces a life altering result, Romans 8:1-4. Therefore, if you are experiencing a power outage or spiritual shortage like me this week, don’t be discouraged. Claim the promise of Philippians 4:13 like Bethany Hamilton in Soul Surfer and God will provide a wave to guide you safely to shore!
by Jay Mankus
an honest servant of Christ


