Tag Archives: coping with death

Desperate Times Call for Desperate Measures

A few years ago, an atheist neighbor cried out to Jesus late in the evening.  When his dog got loose once again, she ran in front of  a car traveling down the street.  With little time to react, this accident could not be avoided.  As his dog struggled to survive, his prayer was fervent, “O Jesus, don’t let my dog die!”  On his way to a local vet, this prayer was repeated several times, speeding off in his SUV.  Unfortunately, sometimes our prayers don’t get answered or the outcome we desire is not fulfilled, ending in another pet tragedy.

Following the terrorists attack on the United States during September 11th, 2001, millions of Americans dropped to their knees to pray.  In this moment of despair, people turned to houses of prayer seeking comfort.  When the South Tower of the World Trade Center came crumbling to the ground at 9:58 am, several thousand were thought to be dead.  Although nearly 3000 did pass away in 3 different states, desperation led countless individuals to re-evaluate their lives.  As a result, families were conceived, relationships renewed and faith born again.

Thirteen years later, the worse is yet to come.  If the book of Revelation is correct, there will be 7 seven years of tribulation, unlike anything the world has seen before.  Once the prophecies within the Bible have been fulfilled, Jesus will return.  Though no one knows the exact day or time, signs have been left as clues to the future in Matthew 24.  I won’t speculate like many false prophets of the past, yet God will continue to use desperate times to achieve His will.  If you reach a point of desolation, may the promise of Psalm 102:17 lead God to hear and answer your prayers.

by Jay Mankus

 

Coping With the Silence of Death

Three weeks ago, Nascar driver Tony Stewart was living his dream, driving and racing on whatever surface he could find.   While competing on a dirt track race at Canandaigua Motorsports Park, Stewart spun out Kevin Ward going into a corner.  One lap later, Kevin got out of his vehicle, stepped toward on coming traffic and was struck by Tony’s back tire.  Flying several feet in the air backwards, Kevin laid motionless as a hushed crowd waited, not sure if what they saw was real.  This is the silence of death.

One of the biggest mistakes individuals make at a funeral is to try to relate with someone who has just lost a loved one.  Although your words may be eloquent and motivated by compassion, the silence of death is different for each person.  Some never recover, like a widow who dies shortly after their spouse passes away.  Others go through months or years of depression before the sun shines upon their bruised and broken soul.  Regardless of where you fit into this spectrum, the silence of death takes its course, using time, reflection and seeking God to ease the pain.

An unnamed author provides insight to the process of healing.  According to Psalm 93:16-17, divine intervention is sent from heaven to those struggling to carry on with life.  Whether through angels, friends or the power of the Holy Spirit, God reaches down to give footing for those slipping away, Psalm 94:18.  Though anger is a natural emotion connection with death, consolation comes once you let go of “what if, why me and how could you?”  As the silence of death lingers for those still not able to cope with this harsh reality, may joy rain from heaven to touch and encourage your soul, Psalm 94:19.

by Jay Mankus

 

Afflictions Eclipsed by Glory

Usually, I have a tendency to ask God, “why me” when troubles arise.  Yet, as I was worshiping the Lord in song this morning, I received a brief reply.  Like a snap shot or vision, my afflictions of the past and present occur so that these trials can be eclipsed by God’s glory.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p7CQ96uohcM

The first major affliction I endured arrived on graduation day, when one of my best friends from high school was diagnosed with cancer.  When her cancer went into remission 1 year later, I breathed a deep sigh of relief until it returned to take Maureen’s life abruptly.  Without experiencing this hardship, I probably would have become a golf course architect, my concentration in college, instead of entering youth ministry.

My second malady was self inflicted, on a golf course while attempting to earn my players card to become a certified P.G.A. professional.  I hit 26 out of 36 greens in regulation, 22 out of 28 fairways and played the hardest hole 1 under par through 2 rounds.  Somewhere in the spiritual realm, strange acts of nature kept by ball from going in the hole, especially when I 3 and 4 putted the same hole, missing my card by 2 shots.  Yet, this epic failure prompted me to become a high school Bible teacher for a decade.

Finally, losing my teaching position in 2012 was a tough blow to my confidence and ego.  However, from the ashes of despair, God carried me until I was ready for my next assignment.  As I start this new adventure on Tuesday with Amazon, I don’t know what the future holds.  Nonetheless, whether, good, bad or indifferent, any afflictions I suffer will surely be eclipsed by God’s glory.

by Jay Mankus

 

When You Will See How Great is God

Life is like riding a new roller coaster for the first time, filled with ups and downs, twists and turns with unexpected corkscrews around blind corners.  Subsequently, individuals change, evolve or are transformed by the ebb and flow of trials.  Nonetheless, unless a caterpillar enters the chrysalis, it will never be able to fly.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yu-2g2K7CEI

When hard times arrive. (and they will find you) there is a tendency to cry out to God, complain and wrestle with reality, Psalm 77:1-4.  Whether its coping with death, illness or unemployment, there is no easy way out.  However, on the day of when storms arise, Asaph provides a blueprint in Psalm 77:5-13 to help struggling souls see how great God is.

The moment you begin to remember recent miracles, times when God carried you or meditate on the works of the Lord, perspectives change.  Yet, this is easier said than done.  In the midst of pain, find rest in God’s chrysalis until your transformation is complete.  After the hurricanes of life, keep your head up so that you will begin to see how great is our God.

by Jay Mankus

There is Nothing General About a Hospital

On April 1st, 1963, the soap opera General Hospital debuted.  More than 50 years later, this hit show has made the Guinness Book of World Records for the longest running soap opera in production.  In addition, this show has earned 11 Day Time Emmy Awards  for Most Outstanding  Drama Series.   Despite this fame and fortune, in real life there is nothing general about a hospital.

Whether you’re a first time parent preparing for the birth of your first child, an unexpected patient or visiting a loved one, the hospital can illicit a wave of emotions.    During my wife’s first and only natural birth, lasting 23 hours, I heard groans, moans and yelling that few men gain access to.  Accident prone individuals will likely find their way to the ER, or remain in a hallway for hours until the next doctor is available.  However, when the Hour Glass of time stops, sobbing and tears fill the hallways, placing life into its proper perspective.

In his farewell address, Moses suggests the choices people make dictate life’s outcome, Deuteronomy 30:15.  Jesus makes a similar statement in Matthew 7:13-14, as each decisions leads toward an eternal destination.  If you find yourself near death’s door, its time to make plans for the afterlife, 1 John 5:13.  May the Lord lead you to experience the promise of Jesus in John 3:16-17 as the hospital generates thoughts about life after tomorrow.

by Jay Mankus

 

 

Not Immune

When the next mind boggling event occurs in America, I’m not afraid to question God, searching for answers to stabbings, shootings and tragedy in public places.  Sometimes I feel like God has removed his presence, moving on to another nation, where hearts are open to truth.  Yet, as soon as trials enter my own life, the Holy Spirit has reminded me this week that Jesus was not immune from heartache.

According to John 11:14, God reveals to Jesus that his friend Lazarus has died.  As He makes his way to the tomb, Jesus is met with a distraught sister, blaming him for her brother’s death, John 11:21.  A second family member has similar feelings, bringing Jesus to tears, John 11:32-35.  While using God’s healing power to raise Lazarus from the dead, John 11:38-44, Jesus’ grief continued.  One of his disciples betrayed him, another publicly denied knowing Jesus and finally the Jews convinced the public leaders to have him crucified.

Unlike the Curse of the Bambino for Boston Red Sox fans, the events of original sin can not be reversed, Genesis 3:16-24.  Perhaps, this may explain Hebrews 12:4, putting life into its proper perspective.  With the circumstances in life continuing to decay, no one is immune from pain.  Therefore, as you fight the good fight, 1 Timothy 6:12, hang in there, encourage the depressed around you and place your trust in the Lord, Proverbs 3:5-6.  Share how you have been helped or reached out to lend a loving hand.

by Jay Mankus

 

 

 

Not The Ending I Envisioned

Gary Sinise played Lieutenant Dan, a Vietnam squadron leader who holds a grudge against Tom Hanks in Forrest Gump, feeling that his destiny was stolen by Gump’s heroic efforts.   Lieutenant Dan believed he was meant to die with his army on the battle field.  Thus, he confronts Forrest, turns to alcohol to drown his sorrow, spending the rest of his life bound to a wheelchair, at least in his mind.

Meanwhile, all Forrest wanted was to be Jenny’s girl, his only friend growing up.  Wherever Forrest was, he thought of Jenny, writing letter after letter, hoping for a storybook ending.  Unfortunately, Forrest received these letters back, returned unopened.  After momma died, Forrest turned to running to clear his mind, tracking thousands of miles across the country.  Despite getting his girl, she dies of H.I.V. before they can grow old together.

Whether you are reading a book, watching a movie or living an act from your life, often the scene doesn’t conclude as you wish.  Instead, the curse of Genesis 3:16-19 provides an alternate ending such as death, paralysis or suicide.  Today, I feel like Lieutenant Dan in the shrimp boat during Hurricane Camille.  However, I’m not telling God “is that all you’ve got?”  Rather, I’ve surrendered, whispering “I can’t take anymore disappointment!”

Psalm 33:10-11 provides the answer to those befuddled by the direction their life has turned.  The Lord foils the plans of nation and thwarts the purposes of people.  I have become a causality of this truth, unable to comprehend the logic of God’s ways.  Yet, somewhere in the pages the promise of Jeremiah 29:11 exists.  Getting to this scene and waiting is the hardest part.  May God’s unfailing love rest on you as you trust the Lord to complete the work that He has begun in you, Philippians 1:6.

by Jay Mankus

Searching for a Reason to Live

Living pay check to check is exhausting, especially when your money disappears before your expenses are fully covered.  Like a high school student bored beyond measure, living for the weekend isn’t any better.  There must be something greater, with meaning and purpose out there.  Thus, my journey has begun to find a reason to live.

Over the weekend I attended a benefit concert for Kay’s Kamp and Ashley’s Orphans.  Kay was one of my former students who died of a rare form of cancer shortly after graduating from Red Lion Christian Academy.  Meanwhile, Ashley’s life was cut short prematurely in a boating accident while she attend the Elementary at Red Lion.  Despite their deaths, their legacies live on by the faith each displayed in their living years.

Lost in my attempt to provide for my family is a higher calling, a vision to make an impact for eternity.  When the Raymond Lee Band donated all of their proceeds from Saturday’s concert to these 2 organizations, my heart was convicted by my selfishness.  Perhaps, we can all learn from this example, sacrificing temporary wants for those around you who are more needy.  May the Holy Spirit, guide each of us to find a higher reason to live, Galatians 5:25.

by Jay Mankus

Trust vs. Want

I’ve heard Psalm 23 read several times at funerals that I’ve attended.  However, this morning the first verse struck a cord within my heart.  “I shall not be in want,” jumped off the pages at me as if God was trying to get my attention.  Will I trust the Lord to fully provide for my needs or will wants inside my sinful nature force me to take back control of my life?

The prophet Isaiah makes another comparison with sheep, claiming each person have moments in life when they reject their shepherd, turning toward their own way, Isaiah 53:6.  While the great shepherd is patient, stubbornness has driven many far from green pastures.  Instead of relying on shepherd’s crook to get back on track, selfish steers countless toward a path of destruction, Matthew 7:13

Nonetheless, the words of Jesus in Luke 15:11-16 are much closer to reality than the average person wants to admit.  If only I could came to my senses, then I would hand over the keys to my lord.  Yet, a long Christmas list of wants has brought me to a spiritual pig pen, stuck in the mud of empty promises of this world.  May the rod of the great shepherd knock some sense into you before another innocent victim enters the grave.  I pray that the valley of the shadow of death will prompt you to trust Jesus, yielding your wants on earth for a greater cause, Luke 15:7.

by Jay Mankus

The Gospel According to Forrest

Forrest Gump once said, “stupid is as stupid does.”  Although Tom Hanks played this fictional character, there is a lot of truth to this statement.  Recently, Riley Cooper, a wide receiver for the Philadelphia Eagles went to a Kenny Chesney concert, had a few drinks, got into a heated argument with a black security guard and blabbered out a racial slur directed toward him.  When you do or say something stupid, it doesn’t mean you have to apologize day after day to make the media feel better.  Living about 30 minutes outside of Philadelphia, Riley Cooper is being crucified on the airways every hour, as callers are picking up the first stone like the account in John 8:1-11.  According to the Gospel of Forrest Gump, “stupid is as stupid does.”

From a spiritual perspective, there is a good reason why people say stupid things.  Since the birth of Cain, every child born on earth has been implanted with a virus.  The Bible refers to this birth defect as the sinful nature or carnality in the original King James version, Romans 7:14-18.  As a result of this disease, individuals and their children have never been the same.  Thus, politicians, professional athletes and average citizens daily fulfill the words of Forrest Gump.

Take for example the daughters of Lot, trying to cope with the loss of their mother, death of their future husbands and a father stricken with depression, Genesis 19:30.  Emulating the practices of their uncle Abraham, Lot’s daughters felt more comfortable trusting in their own wisdom rather than wait on God to provide.  Therefore, they each partake in Indecent Proposal IV & V.  Once their dad is drunk as a skunk, with his beer goggles on, Lot thinks the woman in his tent is a mistress or perhaps a dream that he is sleeping with his wife once again.  Instead, Lot’s daughters take the gutter to a new low, sharing their father on consecutive one night stands, Genesis 19:32-35.  “Stupid is as stupid does!”

Similar to the descendants of Ham, these woman gave birth to the Moabites and Ammonites.  Like Abraham and Lot’s daughters, the Moabites trusted in Egypt when times got tough.  In addition, the Moabites called on Balaam to curse Israel, setting in motion their exclusion from the nation of Israel.  Meanwhile, the Ammonites worshiped the idol Milcom, which also led Solomon astray.  By breaking the first and second commandments, Exodus 20:3-4, a generational curse is poured out upon this nation, Exodus 20:5.  This is why Jesus adds Matthew 18:5-7 to the Bible.  He knew how precious and innocent children are.  Therefore, if you still have time to act, live out Matthew 18:8-9, purging sin from your life so that your children and children’s children don’t inherit the sins of their parents.  Check out Restoring The Foundations ministry online if you want to know more about how sin impacts children.

by Jay Mankus