Tag Archives: love

When Religion is Too Much Work

Posted on May 1, 2018 by expressyourself4him

Within any religion, there is a set of beliefs, doctrines and rules that appeal to certain individuals.  You have to weigh the good with the bad as no perfect church exists.  Thus, denominations offer a wide range of options for families to select from before joining a church.  However, if your connection with God is based upon a religion rather than a relationship, some have come to the conclusion that religion is too much work.

If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless, James 1:26.

As someone who was brought up in the Roman Catholic Church,  I understand the amount of energy a religion based faith requires.  I memorized the Lord’s Prayer, Hail Mary, partook in my first communion, spent six years taking religion classes in CCD and completed my confirmation by taking ownership of my faith.  Fortunately, I was introduced to a Methodist youth group during my sophomore year in high school.  While the church services were similar in some ways, there was a climate of genuine love that was passed on to everyone, even strangers like me.

For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ, Galatians 1:10.

In the passage above, the apostle Paul writes about his struggle between letting go of his zeal for Judaism and his new relationship with Christ.  When you follow a rigid set of rules, there is a tendency to seek the approval of others.  Yet, when anyone makes a decision to devote their life to Jesus, the religious may resent you.  Meanwhile, others reject you from deviating from the defined path within your church doctrine.  If you want to be free from this rigid course, a line from the Shack provides the answer.  During a conversation the main character Mack is talking with Jesus about stereotypes.  Jesus replies, “religion is too much work.  God doesn’t want slaves; He wants you to be part of his family.”

by Jay Mankus

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Light Shines Brighter in the Dark

Posted on April 24, 2018 by expressyourself4him

If you live in the middle or northern parts of the United States, you have probably experienced one of the strangest Springs in recent memory.  After the Northeast experienced four noreasters in March, April has greeted the Midwest with a couple of late snow storms as winter attempts to hold on for another week.  While Spring will eventually give way to Summer, there is one truth hidden within these unusual weather patterns.  Light shines brighter in the dark.

And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their works were evil, John 3:19.

The Bible is filled with references to light and darkness.  Jesus uses light to illustrate that which is good, right and true.  Meanwhile, darkness symbolizes imperfections, lies and secret sins that people are afraid of, hoping that no one finds out these embarrassing deeds.  According to Jesus’ earthly brother, freedom comes from opening up, allowing light to enter darkness, James 5:16.  When confession is genuine and sincere, God’s light brings healing to wounded souls.

For at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light, Ephesians 5:8.

The apostle Paul eludes to this transition in a letter to the church of Ephesus.  Later in this chapter, Paul writes about how human nature influences individuals to gravitate toward darkness, where there are no rules or standards.  Yet, Paul reminds believers of their decision to follow in the footsteps of Jesus, choosing light over darkness.  However, some stop growing along the way, comfortably numb.  In this scenario, imperfections are not exposed as God’s light is not fully magnified.  Although it may be difficult, painful and humbling, let God into every area of your life.  When you do, light will shine brighter in the dark to restore you back toward the narrow path, Matthew 7:13-14.

by Jay Mankus

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Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt

Posted on April 22, 2018 by expressyourself4him

A friend who is a local pastor in Newark has a mantra that he repeats once a month, “hurt people hurt other people.”  Those who receive verbal attacks in the form of negative comments, put downs and sarcasm tend to build up resentment in their hearts.  At some point this frustration will boil over resulting in an emotional explosion.  This climate stunts one’s ability to love others on a constant basis.

The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound, Isaiah 61:1.

Hurt people often wear emotions on their sleeves, sending out negative electricity when rubbed the wrong way.  Sadly, there are demented individuals who get their kicks by picking on someone until they explode.  This trend is made worse by social media sites which allow violent videos that gain attention or go viral.  In my mind, there isn’t anything funny about hurt people hurting others.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid, John 14:27.

Jesus has provided a solution to hurt people in the passage above.  To overcome hate, Jesus extended peace to first century citizens.  Since talk is cheap, Jesus lived out love, reaching out to children, the helpless, poor and sick.  Even when the disciples wanted to call it a day or night, Jesus offered his time to strangers every day.  Despite being falsely accused, sentenced to death and dying on a cross, Jesus loved like He was never hurt.  In view of this, ask the Holy Spirit to fill you with strength so that love will not die.

by Jay Mankus

 

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The Taming of the Cravings

Posted on March 14, 2018 by expressyourself4him

One of William Shakespeare’s well known comedies is the Taming of the Shrew.  Written in the early 1590’s, this play has been adapted numerous times for stage, screen, opera, ballet, and musical theatre.  While this production highlights a bad-tempered and aggressively assertive woman, the Bible speaks of an another beast with a similar reputation.  According to John, this inner demon feeds off of worldly desires.  Fueled by longings, lust and sensual desires, few people have had success in taming these cravings.

Do not love the world [of sin that opposes God and His precepts], nor the things that are in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.  For all that is in the world—the lust and sensual craving of the flesh and the lust and longing of the eyes and the boastful pride of life [pretentious confidence in one’s resources or in the stability of earthly things]—these do not come from the Father, but are from the world, 1 John 2:15-16.

According to Jesus, the eyes serve as the lamp of the human body, Matthew 6:22-24.  If your eyes are good, fixated on Jesus, Hebrews 12:2, spiritual light will guide your steps.  However, if you allow your eyes to wander, take a second glance and begin to stare at unwholesome sights, darkness will enter your body.  This seemingly innocent act starts a chain reaction that awakens fleshly desires.  Those who indulge in masturbation, pornography and or sex outside of marriage corrupts hearts, souls and minds.

The world is passing away, and with it its lusts [the shameful pursuits and ungodly longings]; but the one who does the will of God and carries out His purposes lives forever, 1 John 2:17.

The only cure known to the cravings of the sinful nature is pursuing God’s will.  In his Sermon of the Mount, Jesus tells his audience where your heart is, your treasure will be also.  Thus, those who appease earthly cravings will be distracted, focused on satisfying temporary pleasures in life.  The only way to tame this spiritual shrew is by setting your heart and mind on things above, Colossians 3:1-4.  Those who learn to clothe themselves with Christ can overcome the demons of your past.  While this is not an easy process, may the Holy Spirit fill you with discipline, insight and wisdom to tame any unholy craving within you.

by Jay Mankus

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Jesus’ Last Will and Testament

Posted on March 13, 2018 by expressyourself4him

A will is a legal document that allows you, among other things, to designate how and to whom your property is distributed.  Prior to the formation of modern companies like Legal Zoom, the Old Testament reveals the inheritance process for Jewish families.  Jewish inheritance customs were linked to family blood lines as detailed in Numbers 27:8-11.  The parable of the Prodigal Son refers to the financial breakdown with the oldest son receiving a greater percentage of wealth.  In the case of Jesus, his clothes were decided by chance, as soldiers cast lots to fulfill an Old Testament prophecy.

So they said to one another, “Let us not tear it, but cast lots for it, to decide whose it will be.” This was to fulfill the Scripture, “They divided My outer clothing among them, and for My clothing they cast lots.” 25 So the soldiers did these things.  But standing by the cross of Jesus were His mother, His mother’s sister [Salome], Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene, John 19:24-25.

Prior to his death on a cross, Jesus’ mother was the only family member to believe, remaining faithful to the end.  Since his father Joseph died years earlier, Mary was Jesus’ sole concern.  After members of his family referred to him as a crazy man who had lost his mind in Mark 3:21, Jesus embraced those who did the will of his heavenly father.  These are the individuals who Jesus called his family.  Yet, Jesus’ last will and testament was directed to John, handing the care of Mary over to him.  The passage below suggests that Mary moved into John’s house, staying with him until her death.

26 So Jesus, seeing His mother, and the disciple whom He loved (esteemed) standing near, said to His mother, “[Dear] woman, look, [here is] your son!” 27 Then He said to the disciple (John), “Look! [here is] your mother [protect and provide for her]!” From that hour the disciple took her into his own home, John 19:26-27.

Beyond any possession that you may pass onto family, there is something more valuable.  The legacy that you leave behind will either inspire or deflate your children, family and spouse.  This mark can’t be faked as time will reveal the true nature of your character.  In a sense, Jesus’ legacy was carried on by 11 disciples and first century apostles.  Delegating, preparing and teaching these individuals has kept the good news of Jesus Christ alive today.  As you draw near the grave, may the Holy Spirit prompt you to develop a sense of urgency so that your faith will be passed on to the next generation.

by Jay Mankus

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Forgiving Those Who Don’t Deserve It

Posted on February 28, 2018 by expressyourself4him

You can’t discuss forgiveness without bringing up Jesus’ name.  In the passage below, Jesus is placed on a cross between two criminals sentenced to death.  When Pilate, the governor, gave Jesus a chance to defend himself against trumped up accusations, he remained silent, accepting the fate and plan God set forth.  While all this was happening, Jesus emulated the love of God by forgiving those who didn’t deserve it.

Two other men, both criminals, were also led out with him to be executed. 33 When they came to the place called the Skull, they crucified him there, along with the criminals—one on his right, the other on his left, Luke 23:32-33.

Captain George Kendall was the first person to executed in America.  Influenced by leaders in Great Britain, Kendall was hung in 1608 at the Jamestown colony in Virginia.  Today, 31 states have the death penalty as a punishment for those individuals who have taken another life.  This principle is based upon Jewish law, part of the Torah that Moses passed down for future generations, “life for life, death for death.”  However, the New Testament conveys a new message, Romans 6:23, the gift of God, Jesus Christ who paid the price for all past, present and future transgressions.

Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”[And they divided up his clothes by casting lots. 35 The people stood watching, and the rulers even sneered at him. They said, “He saved others; let him save himself if he is God’s Messiah, the Chosen One,” Luke 23:34-35.

Unfortunately, if you listen to the media and political pundits, forgiveness is a lonely word.  Instead, condemnation, demonizing and judging individuals is a daily ritual.  This relentless attack is void of grace and mercy.  If Jesus can forgive the people who beat, crucified and mocked him, there must be room in our hearts to forgive those who hurt us.  Remember, forgiveness is conditional based upon how you forgive others, Matthew 6:14-15.  Despite whatever rationale you may have devised, the golden rule still remains the standard to live by, treating others as you want to be treated.  Therefore, bear with one another, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.  This is the benchmark which enabled Jesus to forgive those who didn’t deserve it.

by Jay Mankus

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The Enemy of Depth

Posted on February 22, 2018 by expressyourself4him

Anyone who lives in a city, endures a long commute or works in a fast paced environment understands the cramp time places on relationships.  I have allowed this barrier to prevent me from developing deep and meaningful relationships.  Distracted by where I need to go and what I need to do next often leaves me feeling distant from those that I care about.  Unfortunately, as someone who always seems to be in a hurry, impatience has become the enemy of depth.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, 1 Corinthians 13:4.

The opposite of depth is those who suffer from relationship fatigue.  This state occurs when associates, co-workers or friends become too intense, like a leech that sticks to you and won’t let go.  When imperfections, quirks and social warts of individuals wear on your soul, any desire for intimacy fades away.  Thus, any close ties that you might have developed in the past soon dissipate as well.

It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs, 1 Corinthians 13:5.

Sadly, other relationships that you may have hoped to nourish over  time never amount to anything due to fear.  Possibly thinking about prior failed friendships, there is a tendency to avoid becoming too close to someone, afraid the bond that you share will be broken.  In the passages above, the apostle Paul attempts to illustrate what love looks like.  When people begin to forgive and forget, your slate of past wrongs is wiped clean.  Yet, until you emulate the character traits of love, depth will continue to be an enemy.

by Jay Mankus

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Doing Whatever It Takes

Posted on February 12, 2018 by expressyourself4him

As a parent, I can anticipate failure before a grade is given or the final score is relayed.  The secret to this insight is simple, hard work is often rewarded and laziness is penalized.  For me, the most painful aspect of parenting is seeing the potential your child has yet being unable to convince them to do whatever it takes to ensure success.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you, Philippians 4:8-9.

For those of you who coach or teach, this same dilemma exists.  How do you express someone’s gifts or talents without trying to live your life through them?  In the film Good Will Hunting, Robin Williams plays a psychologist who is introduced to a genius played by Matt Damon with a troubled past.  These secret scars, hidden from plain view prevent Will from doing whatever it took to apply his knowledge in a positive manner.

“If you love me, you will keep my commandments,” John 14:15.

Today, the future is bright, but too many young people don’t have the resolve necessary to see their dreams come true.  Sure, the average teenager wants to have a great life, but this doesn’t happen with a snap of your finger.  Only the disciplined, driven and hungry will begin to see the fruits of their labor.  Thus, a parent can encourage, inspire or motivate their offspring.  In the end, a parent can only pray that their child develops a zeal to follow God’s will on earth.  The key to this fulfillment is doing whatever it takes.

by Jay Mankus

 

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Putting the AWE in Awesome

Posted on January 22, 2018 by expressyourself4him

According to a recent study, awesome is one of the most popular words to express something which is considered amazing.  Due to the overuse of this term, awesome has lost some of it’s luster.  This bastardization of the English language has prevented a clear depiction, watered down by too many comparisons with less descriptive words.  Perhaps, it’s time to restore order by putting the awe back in awesome.

Let all the earth fear the Lord; let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of him! – Psalm 33:8

One of the barriers to appreciating awesome is the recent trend of public displays of disrespect by athletes, leaders and politicians.  In some cases, celebrities, journalists and members of the media are encouraging these acts, considered acceptable behavior as long as it’s done to those individuals who possess politically incorrect views.  When disrespect reigns, honor and reverence disappear.  Awe can not be experienced unless a healthy fear and respect for high offices are restored.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love, 1 John 4:18.

According to Luke 19:10, Jesus came to earth to seek and restore that which was lost.  This was accomplished by demonstrating a love that has transformed cultures since the first century.  This agape love is so powerful that souls are overwhelmed, brought to tears by the grace and mercy of God.  Incomprehensible to the average person, perfect love casts out the fear of God’s wrath depicted in the Old Testament.  One prodigal life at a time, Jesus came to earth to mend broken hearts.  Dying on a cross, serving as a perfect lamb, Jesus’ resurrection conquered death, putting the AWE in awesome.

by Jay Mankus

 

 

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Amplify, Clarify and Don’t Intrude

Posted on January 20, 2018 by expressyourself4him

America lost one of their greatest sports broadcasters of all time last week.  Keith Jackson spent 40 years with ABC television before retiring in 2006.  The voice of Jackson allowed him to cross over into a plethora of events from the Wide World of Sports, Major League Baseball, College Football, Monday Night Football, Nascar and the Olympics.  In one of his final interviews, Jackson revealed the secret to his longevity: amplify, clarify and don’t intrude.

For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome, 1 John 5:3.

The first two words of advice go hand in hand.  Amplify refers to developing, elaborating upon and fleshing out what you are watching for the average fan.  The latter, clarify, is the act of clearing up any confusion, filtering out what’s really happening so that the televised game can be enjoyed in it’s purest form.  At the end of his career, Keith Jackson focused on college football, broadcasting PAC 10 on the west coast where he lived.  Catch phrases like Whoa Nellie will be forever tied to Keith’s voice.

And to aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you, 1 Thessalonians 4:11.

One of the things I notice today is that modern commentators, journalists and media pundits do the opposite of Jackson.  Instead of avoiding intrusion, ideas of fame and fortune have inspired self seeking individuals to become a part of the story rather than just report it.  These impure motives are ruining entertainment as celebrities, the elite and hosts now feel like anyone needs to hear their opinions and political beliefs.  If these trends advance, ratings will continue to plummet.  Perhaps, it’s time to listen to an expert, a legend who lived by 3 simple mottos: amplify, clarify and don’t intrude.

by Jay Mankus

 

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