Tag Archives: competition

Living Your Life Based Upon the Children You Bear

Posted on June 26, 2023 by expressyourself4him

Whenever parents are expecting their first child, there is usually some sort of conversation about what their name will be. Two lists will be made, names will be added and crossed out until an ultrasound determines the sex of your soon to be child. As I recently studied the life and children of Jacob, two interesting observations stuck out. First, it appears that Jacob allowed Leah and Rachel to name all of his boys. Second, Leah and Rachel based their overall success in life on the total amount of children they helped conceive.

 When Rachel saw that she bore Jacob no children, she envied her sister, and said to Jacob, Give me children, or else I will die! 2 And Jacob became very angry with Rachel and he said, Am I in God’s stead, Who has denied you children? 3 And she said, See here, take my maid Bilhah and have intercourse with her; and [when the baby comes] she shall deliver it upon my knees, that I by her may also have children. 4 And she gave him Bilhah her maid as a [secondary] wife, and Jacob had intercourse with her. 5 And Bilhah became pregnant and bore Jacob a son. 6 And Rachel said, God has judged and vindicated me, and has heard my plea and has given me a son; so she named him Dan [judged], Genesis 30:1-6.

In the absence of television and social media, activities and conversations were likely an integral part of daily life in the Old Testament. The storyteller of the family would likely recount funny and meaningful events depending upon the audience. At some point, Jacob would have revealed the blessing that he received from Isaac as well as God’s promise to have numerous descendants, like counting stars in the sky on a clear evening. This topic likely triggered a competition between two sisters who appear to place their success is life based upon how many children they each bear.

And Bilhah, Rachel’s maid, conceived again and bore Jacob a second son. 8 And Rachel said, With mighty wrestlings [in prayer to God] I have struggled with my sister and have prevailed; so she named him [this second son Bilhah bore] Naphtali [struggled]. 9 When Leah saw that she had ceased to bear, she gave Zilpah her maid to Jacob as a [secondary] wife. 10 And Zilpah, Leah’s maid, bore Jacob a son. 11 Then Leah said, Victory and good fortune have come; and she named him Gad [fortune], 12 Zilpah, Leah’s maid, bore Jacob [her] second son. 13 And Leah said, I am happy, for women will call me blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied); and she named him Asher [happy], Genesis 30:7-13.

Like two guys trying to outdo their friend, Leah and Rachel go back and forth, thanking God for each child born either by them or their maid. Unfortunately, Jacob appears to be caught in the middle, trying to please two fragile women and their maids. As this quest continues, the twelve tribes of Israel are being formed, named after Jacob’s sons. While Leah may be the winner on paper, bearing the most children, Rachel’s first boy that she conceived is the most famous, Joseph. Despite this sibling rivalry, it’s clear from Moses’ words that God is still in control through it all.

by Jay Mankus

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How About Them Love Apples?

Posted on June 23, 2023 by expressyourself4him

Hollywood movies have certain scenes that speak directly to you. Depending upon your ethnic background, family income and upbringing, some classic scenes will stir your soul. Such is the case of Matt Damon in Goodwill Hunting who plays a janitor surrounded by the smartest students in the country. As two MIT men try to hit on Skylar, it’s Will who ends up walking away with her phone number. This sets the stage for Will’s line: “how do you like them apples.”

Now Reuben went at the time of wheat harvest and found some mandrakes (love apples) in the field and brought them to his mother Leah. Then Rachel said to Leah, Give me, I pray you, some of your son’s mandrakes. 15 But [Leah] answered, Is it not enough that you have taken my husband without your taking away my son’s [a]mandrakes also? And Rachel said, Jacob shall sleep with you tonight [in exchange] for your son’s mandrakes, Genesis 30:14-15.

If you have ever spent much time with two sisters, there’s often some sort of competition to determine superiority. When Leah’s oldest child discovers mandrakes in Jacob’s wheat field, Reuben treats these as a special find. Meanwhile, Moses refers to these as love apples as if a blessing from God. Jealous and hungry, Rachel asks her sister for a couple of mandrakes. When Leah rejects this request, Rachel goes to plan B which benefits both parties.

And Jacob came out of the field in the evening, and Leah went out to meet him and said, You must sleep with me [tonight], for I have certainly paid your hire with my son’s mandrakes. So he slept with her that night. 17 And God heeded Leah’s [prayer], and she conceived and bore Jacob [her] fifth son. 18 Leah said, God has given me my hire, because I have given my maid to my husband; and she called his name Issachar [hired]. 19 And Leah became pregnant again and bore Jacob [her] sixth son. 20 Then Leah said, God has endowed me with a good marriage gift [for my husband]; now will he dwell with me [and regard me as his wife in reality], because I have borne him six sons; and she named him Zebulun [dwelling], Genesis 30:16-20.

Based upon Moses’ description of Reuben’s mandrakes, Leah and Rachel are both able to bear children after eating this special treat. Perhaps, this is why the mandrakes are referred to as love apples as God enables Leah and Rachel to each conceive. Whether these mandrakes served as a placebo or a coincidence prior to being blessed with children, the next time you see Good Will Hunting, don’t forget about them love apples in the Bible.

by Jay Mankus

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Trust the Process of Faith

Posted on January 4, 2022 by expressyourself4him

My high school youth group used active learning exercises to illustrate biblical truths. The one I remember the most is where someone was asked to stand up on a platform. Instead of jumping into a crowd of teenagers, the volunteer is asked to turn around and close their eyes. On the count of 3, this person would fall backwards as two additional volunteers lock arms to catch the person falling.

Strengthen (complete, perfect) and make you what you ought to be and equip you with everything good that you may carry out His will; [while He Himself] works in you and accomplishes that which is pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ (the Messiah); to Whom be the glory forever and ever (to the ages of the ages). Amen (so be it), Hebrews 13:21.

If you have ever struggled with trust, this is a good exercise to participate in. You are forced to place your trust in two strangers that you can’t see since your eyes are closed. The author of Hebrews urges readers to be strengthened in their faith. If you trust that God is working in your life, each day provides a series of obstacles and trials to complete the process of spiritual maturation.

Consider it wholly joyful, my brethren, whenever you are enveloped in or encounter trials of any sort or fall into various temptations. 3 Be assured and understand that the trial and proving of your faith bring out endurance and steadfastness and patience. 4 But let endurance and steadfastness and patience have full play and do a thorough work, so that you may be [people] perfectly and fully developed [with no defects], lacking in nothing, James 1:2-4.

The earthly brother of Jesus adds joy to trusting the process of faith. Like an athlete who thrives in the midst of competition, Christians should embrace opportunities for spiritual growth spurts. Whether you are forced to endure hardship, persecution or undergo temptation, consider any of these situations a pure joy. By trusting the process of faith, maturity will continue as you grow and draw closer to Jesus in 2022.

by Jay Mankus

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Overcoming and the Overcomer

Posted on December 28, 2020 by expressyourself4him

Overcoming refers to one of three scenarios. To defeat another in competition or conflict such as overcoming the opposing team to earn a victory. To deal with successfully by prevailing over a series of obstacles or mount a comeback to redeem yourself. Finally, to overpower with a will to survive, despite being overcome by emotions or personal grief. However, when you examine this word, overcoming takes consistency, discipline, and effort to push on no matter what trial you face.

But he who keeps (treasures) His Word [who bears in mind His precepts, who observes His message in its entirety], truly in him has the love of and for God been perfected (completed, reached maturity). By this we may perceive (know, recognize, and be sure) that we are in Him: 6 Whoever says he abides in Him ought [as [a personal debt] to walk and conduct himself in the same way in which He walked and conducted Himself, 1 John 2:5-6.

Well, 2020 has been like a tsunami that keeps on rising, crashing higher and harder with every wave. Life long dreams to own a business have been either derailed or wrecked for countless entrepreneurs. Meanwhile, college graduates are waiting and waiting for a job in their field, wondering if amassing thousands of dollars in debt was really worth it? Anyone who has endured the Coronavirus, statewide lock downs and job insecurity knows how difficult it is to overcome all of the setbacks 2020 has brought.

Yet you still have a few [persons’] names in Sardis who have not soiled their clothes, and they shall walk with Me in white, because they are worthy and deserving. 5 Thus shall he who conquers (is victorious) be clad in white garments, and I will not erase or blot out his name from the Book of Life; I will acknowledge him [as Mine] and I will confess his name openly before My Father and before His angels, Revelation 3:4-5.

Yet, this is where faith comes into the equation, crying out to an invisible God whose Son has already overcome death, 1 Corinthians 15:54-58. If you feel like you can’t overcome the mountain currently blocking you from achieving success, jump on the Jesus Train to get you over the hump. While the Lord doesn’t promise an easy ride, cling to the one who knows what it takes to be an overcomer. During an intimate conversation with his disciples, Jesus said I am the way, the truth and the life, John 14:6. Don’t be afraid to ride on Jesus’ coat tails until you regain your strength to carry on. Get your ticket to ride the J-Train today.

by Jay Mankus

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What Do You Remember?

Posted on October 13, 2019 by expressyourself4him

A 2016 research study has shown that children exposed to trauma don’t forget it, as previously believed. In an attempt to suppress these painful experiences, these individuals engage in denial as a defense mechanism. These findings peaked my interest as I blocked out most of second grade. While writing a paper for Childhood Development in college, I had to interview my parents about my behavior as a child. As I asked my mother a series of question, I began to realize why I tried to conceal these memories. My stuttering had become so severe that even my own mother regularly couldn’t understand what I was trying to say.

Remember not the sins of my youth or my transgressions; according to your steadfast love remember me, for the sake of your goodness, O Lord! – Psalm 25:7

When my father was transferred to Delaware a year later, this move was a blessing in disguise. The neighborhood in north Wilmington, Delaware that I called home until college was amazing. While some friends like Brad moved away a few years after I arrived, Jeanette, Steven and Richie helped make this a smooth transition. Although I still battled spouts of stammering and stuttering, this community became like an extended family. Every summer I couldn’t wait to get up so that I could play outside until dark. On rainy days, Atari and epic games of Monopoly passed the time. These interactions in North Minister fueled my love for competition and sports.

Remember for my good, O my God, all that I have done for this people, Nehemiah 5:19.

While fond memories from your past are nice to cling to, the Bible reveals what individuals should remember. The Psalmist writes a prayer for change, seeking to forget the wayward decisions of their past. Meanwhile, a servant of the king pleads that God remembers only the good that he has done. The apostle Paul reveals God’s ultimate Paul in 2 Corinthians 5:21. Once the perfect lamb of God (Jesus) died on a cross for our sins and rose from the dead, God no longer sees our imperfections. Thus, this is what our heavenly father wants individuals to remember while residing on earth.

by Jay Mankus

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The Making of a Prodigy or A Waste of Time?

Posted on April 24, 2019 by expressyourself4him

Prodigy’s are especially young individuals, endowed with exceptional abilities, talents and qualities.  When coaches, parents or teachers discover this gift, young people are often pushed to see how good or great they can be.  In some cases adults use these special children as pawns, attempting to live their lives through them.  If an endeavor results in a full college scholarship after years of dedication, practice and persistent is rewarded.  Yet; if these prodigy’s get burned out, lose interest or start to hate the sport they once loved, perhaps these years were a waste of time.

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established, Proverbs 16:3.

As a former coach, I have seen my share of amazing athletes.  After spending three consecutive years at cross country nationals, I began to see key ingredients in becoming an elite runner.  Through conversations with other coaches and parents, most of the national champions joined a local running club early, some starting at the age of 6.  Meanwhile, as a high school golf coach, a similar connection can be made.  Competition, dedication to practice and a swing coach has resulted in one of the strongest classes of female golfers to come out of the state of Delaware.  I won’t be surprised if a few of these young women end playing on the LPGA tour after college.

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, Colossians 3:23.

After I moved back to Delaware two decades ago, a friend gave me the phone number of Max Lucado’s editor.  I spent nearly thirty minutes asking a series of question, wanting to know what it takes to become a professor writer.  After sharing a brief summary of his road to success, one comment stuck out during our conversation.  “If you are going to take this seriously, you need to write full time for seven years to have any chance at getting recognized.”  This year marks my 7th year as an amateur screen writer.  After I submit my two scripts for the 2019 Nicholls Contest by the May 1st deadline, I won’t hear the results until July.  Nonetheless, I have taken a chance, invested hundreds of hours and have become vulnerable to rejection to pursue another dream.  Only time will tell if my attempt at becoming a prodigy writer will result in success or failure.

by Jay Mankus

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Finding Answers in a Loss

Posted on February 20, 2019 by expressyourself4him

At the end of last year, my daughter and I joined a volleyball league. Every Friday night until April, I am able to compete for an hour. While the initial reason for participating was to allow my daughter to sharpen her skills during the offseason, I find myself outclassed by much younger and athletic individuals. The ultimate purpose of any sport is to determine who is the best. Thus, when you lose more than you win, human nature begins to search for answers to explain why your team lost.

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.,” Matthew 5:4.

In her 2017 song Can’t Live Without, Hollyn sings about someone who doesn’t know what they are chasing after. Using the context of a person driving in rush hour, sometimes you are so busy that lose sight of where you are actually going. Near the end of the lyrics, there is a transition which struck a nerve, ” Some people gotta lose it all to find out what they really want.” Progress, success and victory doesn’t require any need for reflection as positive momentum breeds confidence. Yet, embarrassment, failure and losing leads souls to ponder why.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me., 2 Corinthians 12:9

As a former professional athlete, I hate to lose, even if it’s playing a board game with my family at home. However, my desire to win takes joy away from competing. In his book Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis states if you get rid of competition, you eliminate pride. Thus, if you take your focus off of winning and turn it toward savoring the opportunity, it doesn’t matter what the final outcome or scoreboard reads. Thanks to Hollyn’s song, I am now able to see the big picture, a father who is able to spend quality time with his daughter. While our team’s record may be mediocre, I have found an answer in a loss.

by Jay Mankus

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The Sons of this Age

Posted on December 20, 2018 by expressyourself4him

While sharing the parable of the shrewd manager, Jesus makes an interesting observation.  Even in the first century, followers of Jesus did not treat one another as well as non-believers.  Perhaps, competition, immaturity and judgmental spirits began to cause infighting within the body of Christ.  Instead of demonstrating the love of God as salt and light, Matthew 5:13-15, religious leaders afraid to let go of Judaism stunted the spiritual growth of many new converts.

And his master commended the unjust manager [not for his misdeeds, but] because he had acted shrewdly [by preparing for his future unemployment]; for the sons of this age [the non-believers] are shrewder in relation to their own kind [that is, to the ways of the secular world] than are the sons of light [the believers], Luke 16:8.

In the passage above, Jesus refers to non-believers as the sons of this age.  To certain extent, many of these individuals would be categorized as amoral, not knowing right from wrong.  Yet, the parable of the shrewd manager illustrates that it’s never too late to change.  Despite whatever misdeeds you have committed in the past, God uses conviction to elicit repentance.  When the man in this story was fearful his position would be lost, a sense of desperation produced a series of business transactions to save his job.

And I tell you [learn from this], make friends for yourselves [for eternity] by means of the wealth of unrighteousness [that is, use material resources as a way to further the work of God], so that when it runs out, they will welcome you into the eternal dwellings, Luke 16:9.

The passage above urges readers to avoid legalism which stifles faith.  Instead of analyzing this or that, don’t be afraid to use earthly income to make friends for eternity.  While this context contradicts other passages above money, Jesus wants people to realize that material resources purchased by wealth furthers the work of God.  Essentially, what Jesus is saying is the sons of this age are like a harvest waiting to be picked.  However, the workers with the right mentality are few.  Thus, if you want to become fishers of men, set your heart and mind on things above.

by Jay Mankus

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No Doubt About It

Posted on February 6, 2018 by expressyourself4him

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcXdIgEUsHg

When I was young and stupid, I relied on bragging to prove that I could do something.  When challenged, I was often exposed as my cocky words could not be backed up by actions.  Subsequently, God used disappointment, humiliation and failure to allow me to mature.  While I never lost my passion and zeal for competition, I tried to let my play speak for itself in college.  Although I didn’t win every intramural championship, I believed in my heart that victory was attainable.  There was no doubt about it,

There was a violent earthquake, for an angel of the Lord came down from heaven and, going to the tomb, rolled back the stone and sat on it. 3 His appearance was like lightning, and his clothes were white as snow. 4 The guards were so afraid of him that they shook and became like dead men, Matthew 28:2-4.

In recent years, telling the truth is like an animal on the endangered species list.  Some people want to win so badly that exaggerating, fibbing and spreading rumors is all part of the process.  This destructive climate has poisoned politicians with misleading ads, slandering their opponents, hoping the general public will be persuaded to believe these lies.  If you have the cable news, newspapers and social media on your side, the lives of innocent people can be ruined, left like road kill along the shoulder of a highway.

While the women were on their way, some of the guards went into the city and reported to the chief priests everything that had happened. 12 When the chief priests had met with the elders and devised a plan, they gave the soldiers a large sum of money, 13 telling them, “You are to say, ‘His disciples came during the night and stole him away while we were asleep.’ 14 If this report gets to the governor, we will satisfy him and keep you out of trouble.” 15 So the soldiers took the money and did as they were instructed. And this story has been widely circulated among the Jews to this very day, Matthew 28:11-15.

As I am finishing my study of the Gospel of Matthew, I uncovered a similar first century plot.  Fearful the chief priest, Pharisees and religious leaders would lose their political power, they paid off Roman soldiers to spread false reports.  Despite the presence of zombies, the bodies of holy men and women from the past roaming the streets of Jerusalem for over a month, a corrupt scheme eventually halted the truth.  As a former high school Bible teacher, I come across secular films trying to discredit the Bible like this first century bribe.  Yet, when I research, study and watch these theories, I have come to one simple solution.  There is no doubt about the life, death, resurrection and ascension into heaven by Jesus Christ our Lord.

by Jay Mankus

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Praying for the Press

Posted on December 28, 2016 by expressyourself4him

Common sense whispers to the average person that when attacked you should retaliate.  Whether you are talking about competition, gossip or slander, its doesn’t take much for things to become personal.  Thus, when push comes to shove, how you react reflects what’s in your heart.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy,’ Matthew 5:43.”

Since Donald Trump won the 2016 Presidential Election, I have yet to hear the mainstream media say anything positive about the President Elect.  Instead of taking a “let’s wait and see attitude,” liberals and progressives have put on a full court press using hate speech, fake news and misleading opinion editorial pieces to poison the minds of Americas.

But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, Matthew 5:44.

This movement of negative news may not end until Donald Trump leaves the White House.  Yet, for now, there is only one logical solution to calm these muddy waters.  According to Jesus, loving and praying for your enemies serves 2 purposes.  The first sends a message of God’s love and forgiveness.  Then, your response makes people feel bad, Proverbs 25:22.  Although it may be difficult for his supporters, its time to pray for the press.

by Jay Mankus

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