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When God Makes You Laugh

Posted on February 28, 2023 by expressyourself4him

The book definition of sarcasm is the use of irony to mock or convey contempt. Yet, most teenagers use sarcasm as a coping mechanism; a way to prevent their hopes from being ripped out of their hearts. When I struggled to express myself in high school due to stuttering, sarcasm helped ease the pain deep down in my soul. Subsequently, sarcasm and sarcastic friends made me laugh when I really wanted to have a pity party.

And God said to Abraham, As for Sarai your wife, you shall not call her name Sarai; but Sarah [Princess] her name shall be. 16 And I will bless her and give you a son also by her. Yes, I will bless her, and she shall be a mother of nations; kings of peoples shall come from her. 17 Then Abraham fell on his face and laughed and said in his heart, Shall a child be born to a man who is a hundred years old? And shall Sarah, who is ninety years old, bear a son? – Genesis 17:15-17

Despite God’s character and nature in the Old Testament of being righteous and just, there are accounts which reveal the Lord’s sense of humor, 1 Kings 18:15-29. When God calls Elijah to have a spiritual duel with the worshippers of Baal, there are several jabs taken by Elijah, suggestions on why Baal isn’t responding. However, sometimes God will speak to you or send someone into your life to reveal a promise from God that makes no sense logically speaking.

And [he] said to God, Oh, that Ishmael might live before You! 19 But God said, Sarah your wife shall bear you a son indeed, and you shall call his name Isaac [laughter]; and I will establish My covenant or solemn pledge with him for an everlasting covenant and with his posterity after him, Genesis 17:18-19.

When a woman is past their prime according to Google, via Don Lemon, having a child over the age of forty is rare. As for Sarah, she was approaching ninety, which is why Sarah likely laughed sarcastically at the news she would give birth to a child. Sometimes God makes you laugh when you need to be cheered up. However, when you serve a supernatural God, Sarah’s laughter was no joke as God was serious and does fulfill His promise in Genesis 21:5. There is a time for everything so don’t be surprised the next time God makes you laugh.

by Jay Mankus

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S.A.N.S. Episode 311: Go Tell It on the Mountain

Posted on December 9, 2022 by expressyourself4him

I have a special connection with Go Tell It on the Mountain. While in 6th grade, I actually sang a solo in Harlan Elementary’s Christmas play. While my stuttering was my greatest fear, God intervened to nail the second stanza of Go Tell It On The Moutain. As was one of three shepherds, playing second number two. I sang “when I was a young one, I prayed both night and day. I asked to Lord to help me and He showed me the way… which led back to the chorus.

When the angels went away from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us go over to Bethlehem and see this thing ([f]saying) that has come to pass, which the Lord has made known to us. 16 So they went with haste and [[g]by searching] found Mary and Joseph, and the Baby lying in a manger. 17 And when they saw it, they made known what had been told them concerning this Child, 18 And all who heard it were astounded and marveled at what the shepherds told them, Luke 2:15-18.

I tried searching You Tube for one that included my line, but most modern versions don’t include this portion. Therefore, I decided to feature Sara Evans who sang this at the CMA Country Christmas Special on television. It would have been nice to have a copy, proof that I was in a play and that I could sing when I was younger, but most VHS versions didn’t survive. Regardless, this song was inspired by a group of shepherds that God chose to notify about the birth of a baby who would become the Savior of this world.

by Jay Mankus

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Is Winning Everything?

Posted on September 2, 2022 by expressyourself4him

When you’re not a good student as a child, you try to find one aspect of life where you excel. As for me, stuttering prevented me from receiving positive recognition in class. The only thing I seemed to be good at was running. As my stick figure, skinny bones body began to fill in, winning little league games became a habit. Subsequently, I got addicted to winning as it became everything to me.

For whatever is born of God is victorious over the world; and this is the victory that conquers the world, even our faith. 5 Who is it that is victorious over [that conquers] the world but he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God [who adheres to, trusts in, and relies on that fact]? – 1 John 5:4-5.

This winning is everything attitude stuck with me until college. During my first semester at the University of Delaware, I rejected God like Peter who publicly denied knowing Jesus following his arrest, Mark 14:66-72. Although older neighbors warned me of the temptations on campus, I thought I could handle it. Indulging myself in the college party scene taught me a valuable lesson about the Lordship of Christ.

And this is that testimony (that evidence): God gave us eternal life, and this life is in His Son. 12 He who possesses the Son has that life; he who does not possess the Son of God does not have that life. 13 I write this to you who believe in (adhere to, trust in, and rely on) the name of the Son of God [in [c]the peculiar services and blessings conferred by Him on men], so that you may know [with settled and absolute knowledge] that you [already] have life, [d]yes, eternal life, 1 John 5:11-13.

The Fellowship of Christian Athletes brought me back to God. During a spiritual retreat on the campus of James Madison University, a burning conviction penetrated my heart. This gnawed at me all weekend until I jumped out of my chair at an open mic in the wee hours of Sunday morning. During this moment of public confession, I exchanged winning is everything for a will to make Jesus the Lord of my life, Romans 10:9-11. True inning on earth is making your eternal reservations for heaven.

by Jay Mankus

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Five Months of Torment

Posted on August 11, 2022 by expressyourself4him

Torment may involve mental or physical suffering. Those who have endured torment experience extreme circumstances. This is usually associated with a previous accident, battle with illness or ongoing medical condition. My personal torment lasted twenty years of coping with a severe stutter that crippled my ability to share what was on heart or on my mind. Every time I opened my mouth as a child, I was fearful of embarrassing myself like that reading circle in first grade.

Then out of the smoke locusts came forth on the earth, and such power was granted them as the power the earth’s scorpions have. 4 They were told not to injure the herbage of the earth nor any green thing nor any tree, but only [to attack] such human beings as do not have the seal (mark) of God on their foreheads, Revelation 9:3-4.

According to one of his letters to the Church at Corinth, the apostle Paul dealt with his own inner demons. Paul describes this condition as a thorn in his flesh, likely an infected splinter, 2 Corinthians 12:7. According to Paul, a messenger of Satan came to torture and torment him for an extended period of time. Despite these circumstances, 2 Corinthians 12:8-12 reveals the valuable spiritual lesson Paul learned. Whatever your situation, the weaker you are opens the door for Jesus to become strong.

They were not permitted to kill them, but to torment (distress, vex) them for five months; and the pain caused them was like the torture of a scorpion when it stings a person, Revelation 9:5.

Luke 16:19-31 tells a parable of a man suffering in hell. This eternally condemned rich man asks if he can return to earth to warn his living family. Yet, Abraham denies his request as individuals must repent on their own. Today’s passage speaks of a physical torment in the last days on earth. Creatures from the Abyss which are a hybrid between locusts and scorpions were sent to torment mankind. The pain of being stung would linger for up to five months. May this glimpse of future events help you appreciate the little blessings in life.

by Jay Mankus

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When Did Your Ministry Begin?

Posted on May 6, 2020 by expressyourself4him

During his Sunday broadcast on the Trinity Broadcasting Network, Jentezen Franklin told stories of visiting his grandfather as child. Growing up in a family of musicians and preachers enabled Jentezen to develop ministry skills prior to becoming a teenager. These experiences sowed a desire within Jentezen to become a pastor. Looking back, this is where his ministry was conceived. Shortly after listening to this sermon, I received a text informing me that my spiritual mentor Ken Horne had passed away. This news led me to ponder, when and where did my ministry begin.

And Peter answered them, Repent (change your views and purpose to accept the will of God in your inner selves instead of rejecting it) and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of and release from your sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit, Acts 2:38.

As an individual with an addictive personality, when I accepted Jesus into my heart in December of my sophomore year, it taken take long for me to become a Jesus freak. This spiritual pursuit began attending Fellowship of Christian Athlete huddle at Concord High, led by my swim coach Ken Horne. Afraid of stuttering, I spent the next year listening, absorbing everything that I heard. From here I started attending a Methodist youth group, experienced my first Lay Witness Mission revival weekend and went on as many Christians retreats as possible. Several of these moments involved Ken, delegating to me various leaderships roles as my faith grew.

Such [former] ages of ignorance God, it is true, ignored and allowed to pass unnoticed; but now He charges all people everywhere to repent (to change their minds for the better and heartily to amend their ways, with abhorrence of their past sins), Acts 17:30.

While in college, Ken gave me my first opportunity to preach. This weekend in Friendship, Maryland was like having all the stars align in my favor. Beside having an amazing time and connecting with several young people, my stuttering disappeared. Whenever I opened my mouth, the Holy Spirit spoke through me as a vessel for God. My friend Maureen had passed away the previous year from cancer so the message God put on my heart was “It’s Time to Stop Playing Games by Getting Right with God.” At the end of my message I played the song Feel the Nails by Ray Boltz. Before the song concluded, several members of this church ran to the altar. This one event in 1990 cemented my calling and it was here where my ministry began.

by Jay Mankus

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What Do You Remember?

Posted on October 13, 2019 by expressyourself4him

A 2016 research study has shown that children exposed to trauma don’t forget it, as previously believed. In an attempt to suppress these painful experiences, these individuals engage in denial as a defense mechanism. These findings peaked my interest as I blocked out most of second grade. While writing a paper for Childhood Development in college, I had to interview my parents about my behavior as a child. As I asked my mother a series of question, I began to realize why I tried to conceal these memories. My stuttering had become so severe that even my own mother regularly couldn’t understand what I was trying to say.

Remember not the sins of my youth or my transgressions; according to your steadfast love remember me, for the sake of your goodness, O Lord! – Psalm 25:7

When my father was transferred to Delaware a year later, this move was a blessing in disguise. The neighborhood in north Wilmington, Delaware that I called home until college was amazing. While some friends like Brad moved away a few years after I arrived, Jeanette, Steven and Richie helped make this a smooth transition. Although I still battled spouts of stammering and stuttering, this community became like an extended family. Every summer I couldn’t wait to get up so that I could play outside until dark. On rainy days, Atari and epic games of Monopoly passed the time. These interactions in North Minister fueled my love for competition and sports.

Remember for my good, O my God, all that I have done for this people, Nehemiah 5:19.

While fond memories from your past are nice to cling to, the Bible reveals what individuals should remember. The Psalmist writes a prayer for change, seeking to forget the wayward decisions of their past. Meanwhile, a servant of the king pleads that God remembers only the good that he has done. The apostle Paul reveals God’s ultimate Paul in 2 Corinthians 5:21. Once the perfect lamb of God (Jesus) died on a cross for our sins and rose from the dead, God no longer sees our imperfections. Thus, this is what our heavenly father wants individuals to remember while residing on earth.

by Jay Mankus

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A Man of Few Words

Posted on June 29, 2019 by expressyourself4him

Bitterness, covetous, discontent, envy and resentment are words associated with jealousy.  A day doesn’t pass without me envious of individuals blessed with a great personality.  Some people are never at a loss with words, always knowing what to say and when.  Although I spent a decade teaching high school students, day to day conversions have never come easy for me.  While I may a desire to be the life of the party, I am normally a man of few words.

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer, Psalm 19:14.

Perhaps, this loss for words goes back to my childhood, born with a severe speech impediment.  Beside being teased, the act of opening my mouth was an adventure.  I never knew when I was going to stutter, but when I started I couldn’t verbalize a coherent word.  These experiences led me to shy away from talking, afraid of another stuttering spasm that often triggered me to hyperventilate.  This embarrassing past has influenced me to become a man of few words.

And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him, Colossians 3:17.

Yet, one man’s weakness has yielded a hidden treasure.  Instead of speaking, the Lord had another plan for my life.  With a few mentors in high school who just happened to be teachers, a seed was planted for the love of communicating.  As the years past, poetry led to short stories and song writing.  From here, doors opened to publish a monthly news letter which led to a staff writer position.  As words continued to flow from within, a man who spoke few words can’t stop thinking of new topics to write about daily.  Thus, as I post my 2700th blog today, I have come to terms with my own limitations.  It’s okay to be a man of few words as long as I Express Myself for God.

by Jay Mankus

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The Shell Game

Posted on August 18, 2018 by expressyourself4him

The Shell Game is symbolic of three stages in life: early childhood development, reaching your prime and going through a mid-life crisis.  As a child, a lack of confidence, fear and insecurities cause many young people to hide who they really are.  When afraid, frightened or threatened, most turtles seek shelter under their shell, disappearing and hiding underneath until its safe to come out.  Likewise, human beings possess a similar defense mechanism, withdrawing from society until assurance, confidence and hope is restored.

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing, James 1:2-4.

In the early years, stuttering prevented me from ever expressing myself clearly as a child.  Being made fun of, mocked and teased was too much to endure.  These attacks against what I could not control led me to live a private life until my teenage years, participating in solitary play, imagining what it would be like for me to talk without stuttering.  After my dad was transferred from New Jersey to Delaware, a neighborhood of kids helped me come out of my proverbial shell.  Friends like Jeanette, Steven and Richie overlooked my stuttering, seeing a potential that no one else had prior.

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us, Romans 5:3-5.

By the beginning of my senior year of high school, my faith in Christ, amazing friends and an unquenchable fire for life transformed me.  This one year served as a catalyst to do things I never imagined possible.  Despite periods of stammering, God inspired me to become a youth pastor, high school teacher and invest the prime of my life coaching, mentoring and sharing my faith with others.  During this fifteen year period, I was filled with unswerving faith that allowed me to experience the abundant life, witness miracles and experience a spiritual awakening within Columbus, Indiana.  Unfortunately, at some point in the last fifteen years, I have reverted back to playing the shell game, trying to hide the person that I have become.

Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed, 1 Peter 4:12-13.

At some point in life, whether you call it a mid-life crisis or the painful reality that you’re not the same person that you use to be, this fact is hard to swallow.  Recently, I have tried to go back in time, to see where I went wrong.  When you don’t have the energy, drive or passion anymore, its hard to make progress or fix the flaws that are obviously present in my life.  What makes matters worse is seeing a shell of the person that you used to be and feel powerless to alter, change or repair the damage done.  If you reach this stage in life like me, Jesus is the only one who can mend your pain.  While restoration is a long process with bumps along the way, Jesus is like Med-Express, available at any time you need medical and spiritual attention.  As this endless shell games presses on, reach out to Jesus, who will hold your hand through the storms of life.  May this blog comfort your soul as you endure the good, the bad and the ugly in the shell game called life.

by Jay Mankus

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Ephphatha: A Prayer to Heal Stuttering

Posted on April 1, 2018 by expressyourself4him

Whenever I come in contact with an individual born with a speech impediment or stuttering, I cringe.  When encountering a stranger or someone I know who struggles to get words out of their mouths, I feel utterly helpless.  As a former stutterer, every condition and degree varies from person to person.  While I want everyone to be healed, I have been unable to intervene until know.

They brought to Him a man who was deaf and had difficulty speaking, and they begged Jesus to place His hand on him, Mark 7:32.

Prior to completing his gospel, John Mark a member of the apostle Paul’s ministry team either interviewed or spoke with an eyewitness to one of Jesus’ many miracles.  Known as Mark to avoid being confused with the disciple with the same name, this gospel contains a prayer spoken by Jesus.  Although the man in this passage was deaf and mute, the word Ephphatha can be used as to prayer to heal stuttering.

Jesus, taking him aside by himself, away from the crowd, put His fingers into the man’s ears, and after spitting, He touched the man’s tongue [with the saliva]; 34 and looking up to heaven, He sighed deeply and said to the man, “Ephphatha,” which [in Aramaic] means, “Be opened and released!” 35 And his ears were opened, his tongue was released, and he began speaking plainly, Mark 7:33-35.

To avoid setting desperate people up for failure, there are multiple variables that cause people to stutter.  For some its a medical condition, others stutter due to nerves or a lack of air that lead to shortness of breath.  According to the Bible, demons and unclean spirits have the power to cease or constrict one’s ability to verbalize thoughts or feelings.  Meanwhile, doubt, a lack of faith and unbelief cause many to stammer and stutter for a lifetime.

Jesus replied to them, “I assure you and most solenly say to you, if you have faith [personal trust and confidence in Me] and do not doubt or allow yourself to be drawn in two directions, you will not only do what was done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and thrown into the sea,’ it will happen [if God wills it]. 22 And whatever you ask for in prayer, believing, you will receive,” Matthew 21:21-22.

Prior to being healed of stuttering during my final full year of college, Christian friends questioned my faith whenever I stuttered.  While my roommates and a church friend laid hands on me, claiming Ephphatha, my healing was gradual, not immediate.  Even now when I stray from God, spouts of stuttering return until I draw near the Lord again.  I want to share my testimony to give the defeated a glimpse of hope for the future.  I’m not sure why God choose to heal me, but I believe faith, godly friends and the power of God to open and release tongues via the Holy Spirit can serve as a prayer to heal stuttering.

by Jay Mankus

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How Relevant are You?

Posted on February 9, 2016 by expressyourself4him

I spent the majority of my years as a student in obscurity, afraid my stuttering would embarrass me in some way.  It wasn’t until my senior year of high school that I began to become relevant, serving on student council, volunteering to help build the class float for homecoming and reaching out to individuals throughout the school.  Whether popularity makes you relevant or not, I came into my own as a human being, with the highlight turning my parents basement into a nightclub for one Christmas evening during my freshmen year of college.

What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? – James 2:14

In the years that followed, inconsistency is the best term that describes my life.  I had my moments in the spot light, playing sand volleyball at Geauga Lake in its hey day, serving as a journalist for Travel Golf Media and store manager of Michael Jordan Golf at O’Hare International Airport.  However, I consider these personal accomplishments, not something that makes you relevant.  The best way to explain relevance is by quoting Larry the Cable Guy, ” get ur done!”  Yet, what if you invest your time and energy into things that are trivial?

In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead, James 2:17.

From an eternal perspective, my most relevant year was 1993.  I spent the first portion at a youth ministry trade school called Tentmaker’s, fine tuning my spiritual gifts.  The next three months involved applying this new found knowledge as a counselor and teacher at a boarding school for career underachieving junior high students.  The final six months of 93 were my finest, serving as a youth pastor in Columbus, Indiana.  These days were the epitome of relevance, meeting my wife to be in the final month of this year.  Yet, for now, I struggle to find relevance, distracted by the stress of life.  Although its nice to reminisce from time to time, its never to late to become relevant again.  May we all strive to find our place in this world so that our deeds, faith and work will not be done in vain.

by Jay Mankus

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