Tag Archives: weddings

I Guess They Meant What They Said

Posted on August 15, 2023 by expressyourself4him

One of the best parts of any wedding is the reception. This gives those in attendance time to share their initial impressions of the ceremony while it’s fresh in their minds. Following my own wedding back in 1995, my wife’s mom, Barb, had a special moment with one of her friends. Barb recounted this story to me following our honeymoon. Barb said, “most of the weddings I attend, I’m not sure whether it’s going to last. However, based upon their vows and what they said, I have a good feeling this marriage is going to last a lifetime.” Nearly 28 years and counting.

Two are better than one, because they have a good [more satisfying] reward for their labor; 10 For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! – Ecclesiastes 4:9-10.

Before any young couple decides to tie the knot, there are numerous ways to prepare. Some choose marriage counseling, others attend pre-marriage Christian conferences, and others simply read as many books on the topic of marriage as possible. My wife Leanne and I did all three of these options. Yet, this doesn’t guarantee a successful marriage. Having spiritual mentors can help you through the highs and lows in life, but ultimately marriages that pray together tend to stay together. The last missing link is developing a will to love your spouse like Christ loves the church.

Again, if two lie down together, then they have warmth; but how can one be warm alone? 12 And though a man might prevail against him who is alone, two will withstand him. A threefold cord is not quickly broken, Ecclesiastes 4:11-12.

As for my own marriage, my long hair is gone, I’ve put on forty pounds, and following my emergency eye surgery, it’s hard for me to be in a picture without sunglasses on. Nonetheless, my will to love my wife Leanne has enabled me to keep my wedding vows. Yet, like any human being, I have bad days that may turn into weeks. Thank God that faith isn’t a feeling; it’s a mindset and way of life. Just like the words of Jeremiah in Lamentations 3:19-24, God’s forgiveness is new every day. This biblical promise and many like it have helped Leanne and I mean what we said long ago.

by Jay Mankus

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When God Sees Grown Adults Act Like Children

Posted on August 8, 2023 by expressyourself4him

https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=red+carpet+by+age+of+faith

Portions of the passage below are often found on wedding bulletins. While the number 13 is considered an unlikely number to those who study numerology, 1 Corinthians 13 is known as the love chapter of the Bible. However, after taking a closer look at the full context of the apostle Paul’s words to members of the Church at Corinth, there is a call for adults to grow up and stop acting like children.

Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily. 5 It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]. 6 It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail. 7 Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening], 1 Corinthians 13:4-7.

As I approach 54 in August, I view the Lord through the eyes of a patient father. Jesus paints God the Father in the parable of the Prodigal in Luke 15 like an old man sitting on his front porch waiting for his son to come home. Free will allows this young man in Jesus’ story to seek pleasure in temporary treasures until his wealth is squandered. Only when this man comes to his senses in Luke 15:16-18 does he put aside his childish ways.

For our knowledge is fragmentary (incomplete and imperfect), and our prophecy (our teaching) is fragmentary (incomplete and imperfect). 10 But when the complete and perfect (total) comes, the incomplete and imperfect will vanish away (become antiquated, void, and superseded). 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; now that I have become a man, I am done with childish ways and have put them aside, 1 Corinthians 13:9-11.

While most adults may not want to admit this, we all have a similar story to tell if you’re humble enough to confess your past sins, James 5:16. Testimonies serve as a valuable spiritual tool to lure the lost back from their prodigal ways. May today’s blog speak to your heart so that any loved ones who have gone astray will return home physically and spiritually. The first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem, I’m a grown adult who has acted like a child.”

by Jay Mankus

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Curiosity and Excitement

Posted on May 9, 2023 by expressyourself4him

When my son Daniel got engaged early this Spring, a sense of curiosity and excitement filled my heart. The curiosity was based upon where and when the wedding will take place. This was followed by the excitement of welcoming Anna into our family as well as looking forward to this special weekend in August. Unfortunately, most Christians don’t look at faith from the perspective of curiosity and excitement.

The girl related to her mother’s household what had happened. 29 Now Rebekah had a brother whose name was Laban, and Laban ran out to the man at the well, Genesis 24:28-29.

When Eliezer informed Rebekah’s family that he was searching for a spouse for his master’s son, a spirit of curiosity and excitement filled Rebekah’s house. Who is this Isaac? What does he look like? Where does he work and what does he like to do in his free time? These are just a few questions that family members ask before their relative gets married.

For when he saw the earring or nose ring, and the bracelets on his sister’s arms, and when he heard Rebekah his sister saying, The man said this to me, he went to the man and found him standing by the camels at the well. 31 He cried, Come in, you blessed of the Lord! Why do you stand outside? For I have made the house ready and have prepared a place for the camels, Genesis 24:30-31.

Rather than become curious and excitement for this upcoming weekend, what if Christians faced each day with a new mindset. Instead of going through the motions of a long work week, believers can start embracing each new day with an eager curiosity and passionate excitement. Perhaps, this is what Jesus meant to express in John 10:10. Living an abundant life that Jesus claims and promises to exist could become reality with a daily sense of curiosity and excitement.

by Jay Mankus

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S.A.N.S. Episode 31: Go There With You

Posted on March 6, 2022 by expressyourself4him

From my introduction to Christian music in 1985, there have always been 3 main staples who have gotten most of the accolades: Michael W. Smith, Amy Grant, and today’s artist Stephen Curtis Chapman. When Chapman’s Great Adventure tour traveled across the country, I drove three hours to hear an album filled with classic songs. I was so touched that night by Go There with You, that I included it in my wedding.

God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and death shall be no more, neither shall there be anguish (sorrow and mourning) nor grief nor pain any more, for the old conditions and the former order of things have passed away, Revelation 21:4.

When I was put in charge of the Music at my wedding and the DJ at our reception, I made a mix with all of the songs to be played for all of the special dances. When Leanne and I danced our first dance as a married couple, Go There With You was played. In an age where staying married until death do us part is rare, playing this song was a statement of my will to love Leanne for the rest of my life.

by Jay Mankus

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What a Will to Love Can Do for You

Posted on November 25, 2020 by expressyourself4him

Twenty five years ago I was initiated into a large family. At a Thanksgiving Dinner of nearly 100 relatives, I was a target of those who attended. “Wondering who is this guy who is going to marry Leanne,” I was introduced, interviewed, and grilled by complete strangers. After several hours of intense conversations, I passed this final test two days prior to our wedding.

Be gentle and forbearing with one another and, if one has a difference (a grievance or complaint) against another, readily pardoning each other; even as the Lord has [freely] forgiven you, so must you also [forgive], Colossians 3:13.

A quarter of a century ago, God was just beginning to reveal a special gift in me. This talent was first unveiled while teaching poetry at a boarding school in West Virginia. Thus, as I was finishing up the final details of our wedding, I wrote a paragraph about what love meant to me. After a couple of edits, this appeared in our wedding bulletin. This statement served as a testimony about the importance of the will to love in marriage.

And above all these [put on] love and enfold yourselves with the bond of perfectness [which binds everything together completely in ideal harmony]. 15 And let the peace (soul harmony which comes) from Christ rule (act as umpire continually) in your hearts [deciding and settling with finality all questions that arise in your minds, in that peaceful state] to which as [members of Christ’s] one body you were also called [to live]. And be thankful (appreciative), [giving praise to God always], Colossians 3:14-15.

The best way to define a will is something that you are bound to. In the context of marriage, this is a covenant that you enter in, promising “til death due us part.” Meanwhile, the Greek word for charity is φιλανθρωπία. The apostle Paul writes an entire chapter devoted to love in 1 Corinthians 13, a common Bible reading for weddings. Yet, if you want your marriage to last a lifetime, a will to love is the secret to maintaining my marriage for the past 25 years. Wishing my wife Leanne a Happy Anniversary. I love you!

by Jay Mankus

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The Giving and Taking of Life

Posted on May 26, 2019 by expressyourself4him

Twenty four hours ago, I was celebrating my oldest son’s wedding.  As I witnessed James and Emma’s love for one another, an overwhelming sense of joy touched my heart.  This event highlights a blessing from God as the giver of life in the form of gifts from above, James 1:17.  Unfortunately, I received a text a few hours ago informing me that my uncle John, my dad’s oldest brother, passed away this afternoon.  This wave of emotions has reminded me of the giving and taking of life.

So Satan departed from the presence of the Lord and struck Job with loathsome boils and agonizingly painful sores from the sole of his foot to the crown of his head. 8 And Job took a piece of broken pottery with which to scrape himself, and he sat [down] among the ashes (rubbish heaps), Job 2:7-8.

Every month or so I stumble upon a television evangelist who paints the Christian life through rose colored glasses.  These messages follow the same script, promising that the moment you enter into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, all of your troubles will disappear.  While new believers will possess a new found hope, this depiction of life is not realistic.  With every blessing, individuals will also endure hardship, pain and suffering.  According to Job, you have to accept the good with any bad that comes your way.

Then his wife said to him, “Do you still cling to your integrity [and your faith and trust in God, without blaming Him]? Curse God and die!” 10 But he said to her, “You speak as one of the [spiritually] foolish women speaks [ignorant and oblivious to God’s will]. Shall we indeed accept [only] good from God and not [also] accept adversity and disaster?” In [spite of] all this Job did not sin with [words from] his lips, Job 2:9-10.

In the passage above, Job’s wife speaks as if thinking out loud.  As she witnessed the boils covering her husband, anguish, grief and frustration motivated her response to “curse God and die.”  In the heat of the moment, knee jerk reactions are a common occurrence.  Nonetheless, if you are looking for answers to why God allows bad things to happen to good people, Job nails it!  You must accept the good with the bad.  According to one of Jesus’ disciples, going through trials are designed to build character, 1 Peter 1:6-7.  Therefore, If you want to possess a realistic approach to life, roll with the punches as you experience the giving and taking of life.

by Jay Mankus

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The Circle of Life

Posted on May 23, 2019 by expressyourself4him

Twenty two years ago, my wife Leanne received confirmation that she was pregnant with our first child.  While I was able to share this good news in person with my mom, my father was away on a business trip.  This good news was replaced by sorrow as my grandmother passed away on this same day.  Following the funeral of my dad’s mother, new parenting classes attempted to prepare us for raising a child.  Twenty one years ago over Memorial Day Weekend, Leanne endured 29 hours of labor to give birth to James.

I assure you and most solemnly say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone [just one grain, never more]. But if it dies, it produces much grain and yields a harvest, John 12:24.

Fast forwarding 19 years, another tragedy illustrates the circle of life.  Leanne’s father was in a bad car accident, battling to stay a live for a couple of weeks.  Away at college, James wasn’t able to be there as his grandfather passed away.  However, James did call the hospital, breaking the news over the phone of a new girl friend.  Jim’s funeral introduced Emma to our family, fitting in naturally.  One year later, James shared he proposed to Emma, setting the date of his own wedding this Memorial Day Weekend.  As death takes one soul away, the birth of a new relationship sets the stage for the circle of life to be completed.

The one who loves his life [eventually] loses it [through death], but the one who hates his life in this world [and is concerned with pleasing God] will keep it for life eternal, John 12:25.

As I experience hosting my first rehearsal dinner tonight, I am passing the torch to my oldest son.  After tonight, James is on his own, starting a new journey with his soul mate Emma.  I’m not sure exactly what to say, but all I know is to pass on words of wisdom from the Bible.  As I think of the perfect thing to say, I am reminded of Jesus’ comments in the passage above.  In the context of marriage, two will become one.  Just as individuals must die to self so that Christ might live, couples must yield to God to take the wheel, direction in life.  As my wife and I complete one task, raising James, we look forward to becoming supportive parents in Emma and James’ future endeavors.

by Jay Mankus

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The Cost of Life

Posted on February 5, 2018 by expressyourself4him

Twenty years ago, the best man in my wedding convinced me that it was a good idea to purchase my first life insurance plan.  With my wife’s blessing, I agreed as this friend was also an insurance agent, excited to have me as one of his first clients.  Well, I made it to age 48, causing my policy to come up for renewal in January.  As a reward for out living this, I received a letter in the mail.  To my surprise, the cost of my next plan has tripled, suggesting that keeping me as a customer may be too risky.  This shocking reality has opened my eyes to the cost of life.

For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? – Luke 14:28

If you have a calculator with you or is easily available, jot down a couple of numbers before you start adding up everything.  What do you annually pay for auto insurance, cable, electric, food, gas, health insurance, internet, phone and water?  Before you get any more depressed, starting estimating the price of life for just one year on earth.  Perhaps, this may explain why adults are leaving civilization to begin living off the grid.  Those addicted to modern inventions are stuck flipping the bill to the cost of this life.

Remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life, and imitate their faith, Hebrews 13:7.

Growing up as a teenager, the Price is Right was my favorite game show, watching this on sick days or reruns after school.  While I understand the concept of this popular show, somewhere along the way the price of life has gotten out of control, no longer right.  The thought of waiting for a bus, living without a cell phone or foregoing internet access seems unbearable.  Yet, if you want to reclaim your freedom from the almighty dollar, you might want to begin making plans to purge yourself from unneeded distractions that inflate the cost of life.

by Jay Mankus

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Friends Along the Way

Posted on January 16, 2018 by expressyourself4him

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ped1jYLFtkA

As a child, there was nothing like a sleep over, especially if it meant going away with a friend or neighbor’s family.  High school brought class trips, spending a day or weekend on a field trip.  College introduced the concept of road trips, going some where at the spur of a moment, chilling and hanging with buddies.  For those who marry, weddings result in Honeymoons and if kids arrive, family vacations in the future.  Ultimately, as you go through life alone or with a significant other, each day serves as an opportunity to become friends along the way.

After this, Jesus traveled about from one town and village to another, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom of God. The Twelve were with him, Luke 8:1.

If you use the Bible as a source, Jesus lived in relative obscurity, serving as a carpenter in Nazareth.  Single and living with his mother, Jesus wasn’t searching for a woman or seeking to build his business.  Rather, Jesus was waiting until the Holy Spirit revealed the ideal time to begin his earthly ministry.  When this moment arrived, Jesus spent a majority of his time on the road, traveling from town to town with his twelve disciples.  As people began to receive healing, experience miracles and transform their lives, a bond developed between Jesus and his followers.  I guess you can say Jesus was a model for finding friends along the way in life.

While a large crowd was gathering and people were coming to Jesus from town after town, he told the parable of the Sower, Luke 8:4.

As I look back on the past 6 years of my writing, there is only one earthly person I can credit for my progress.  Spencer Saints who has his own travel blog entitled Friends Along the Way, Friendsalongtheway.org, is the person who encouraged me to pursue a writing career.  Through the years, Spencer introduced me to a writer’s group, started his own and steered me in the right direction as I began to write movie scripts.  We all meet friends along the way in life, but few express how they feel before they are gone.  May this blog inspire you to reach out to those who have helped you along the way, especially during the bleak moments in life.

by Jay Mankus

 

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Thank You For the Journey

Posted on May 7, 2017 by expressyourself4him

Following birthdays, graduations and weddings, individuals often feel compelled to send thank you cards.  While certain presents are more impressive than others, it’s the thought that counts.  Although this process may be time consuming, it’s the appropriate response.

Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you, 1 Thessalonians 5:18.

Unfortunately, most people don’t do the same with the Lord.  After a remarkable day, month or phase in life, it’s time to give the Lord the credit for victories in life.  Sure, you might have put in the effort and time to succeed.  Yet, it never hurts to thank God for the journey of life.

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change, James 1:17.

In the New Testament, the apostle Paul took missionary journeys to spread the good news about Jesus Christ.  Some trips were extended while others were cut short.  Other plans were thwarted due to demonic forces.  Like making a wedding vow, in the good or bad, make sure you take a moment daily to pause by thanking God for the journey.

by Mankus

 

 

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