Tag Archives: the road to recovery

Do You Have it All Together?

Posted on December 14, 2018 by expressyourself4him

As a recovering perfectionist, hints of chaos is an unpleasant sight.  For some reason, I feel the need to give the impression that I have it all together.  Everything is fine, it is well with my soul.  I wish this was the case, but often I find myself on the verge on collapse.  Hanging by a thread, like the classic Mike and the Mechanics song.  Thus, if you want a simple answer, no I don’t have it all together.

Now while they were on their way, Jesus entered a village [called Bethany], and a woman named Martha welcomed Him into her home. 39 She had a sister named Mary, who seated herself at the Lord’s feet and was continually listening to His teaching. 40 But Martha was very busy and distracted with all of her serving responsibilities; and she approached Him and said, “Lord, is it of no concern to You that my sister has left me to do the serving alone? Tell her to help me and do her part,” Luke 10:38-40.

While admission, confession is the first step on the road to recovery, the next logical question is if I don’t have it all together, what’s the problem?  To start with, perfectionists like me tend to suffer from the Martha complex.  A first century doctor refers to this condition as concentrating and fixating on the external.  Instead of entering into a deep and meaningful conversation with Jesus, Martha was focused on making her house spotless.  Consumed by trying to be a good host, Martha missed the point, life is about relationships not perfection.

But the Lord replied to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered and anxious about so many things; 42 but only one thing is necessary, for Mary has chosen the good part [that which is to her advantage], which will not be taken away from her,” Luke 10:41-42.

Part of my perfectionist rehab involves abstaining from the need to be a workaholic by slowing down enough to entertain small talk.  While these daily conversations may not get very far or amount to anything, they set the stage for permanent meaningful conversations to begin.  If you spend most of your time on earth busy, running around like your head is cut off (old youthism), you’ll never know what you have in common with others.  Therefore, as Christmas approaches, make sure you follow in the steps of Mary by choosing conversation as a means to pass time with family.

by Jay Mankus

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Skeletons of Your Past

Posted on August 15, 2017 by expressyourself4him

Despite how perfect some individuals may act, behave and live out on a daily basis, everyone possesses imperfections.  These blemishes often result in a dark side with secret addictions, bad habits or unthinkable acts that would shock the average person.  This collection of scars accumulate into skeletons of your past.

If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us, 1 John 1:8-10.

There was a time in American history where honesty was the best policy.  However, sometimes revealing a skeleton or two from your past can do permanent damage.  Recently. Pete Rose admitted to having an inappropriate relationship with a minor back in the 1970’s.  This confession sent shockwaves across the country, igniting outrage throughout social media.  Based upon the comments posted, it’s as if this was the worst act ever committed.

But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh, Galatians 5:16.

The second aspect of confession is taking the steps toward the road to recovery.  Perhaps, this may explain the criticism of Rose over his lack of contrition for his previous transgressions.  Thus, if you want to experience healing from the skeletons of your past, you must learn to walk according to the Holy Spirit.  Based upon the apostle Paul’s advice in 1 Corinthians 10:13, God will provide a way out when temptations arrive.  In your journey toward healing, may the Lord guide you out of bondage to find freedom in the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ.

by Jay Mankus

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The Price of Life

Posted on August 14, 2016 by expressyourself4him

Whenever you have an accident, are diagnosed with a disease or face a long rehab, its hard to put a price on life.  After breaking two ribs and collapsing a lung, two ambulance rides cost nearly one thousand dollars each.  Treatments for cancer can accumulate into the tens of thousands.  Meanwhile, braces, surgeries and wheel chairs aren’t too far behind, cutting into the life savings of those face with life altering conditions.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly, John 10:10.

On the road to recovery, individuals have to consider the cost.  Do you I want to extend my life?  Or do I want to end my suffering?  Sure, parents and loved ones will often do whatever necessary to keep the hope of healing alive.  Yet, as time goes by, its up to the injured party to possess the desire and will to carry on.  So what is the price of a life?  Should you place a limit or should you adopt the Master Card slogan that life is priceless?

For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it, Matthew 16:25.

According to Jesus, there is something else more important than saving your life.  The human soul is more valuable as it controls your eternal destiny.  Thus, before you extend all your time and energy on trying to survive, don’t forget about eternal life.  One of Jesus’ disciples claims that you can know for sure before you die, 1 John 5:13.  Therefore, make your reservation today as a soul destined for is a horrible fate to face.  The price of life is worth it all as long as a decision has been made, Romans 10:9-10.

by Jay Mankus

 

 

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Put Me Back Together

Posted on February 26, 2014 by expressyourself4him

Whether you want to admit it or not, everyone has 3 things in common with Humpty Dumpty.  First, at some point in time, you’ll find yourself living on the edge, trying to hang on or stay in control.  Second, you will experience a great fall, either physically, spiritually or both.  Finally, you’ll discover what it means to be helpless, needing someone else to put you back together.

In Psalm 31:12, King David compares himself to a piece of broken pottery, shattered into pieces.  The apostle Paul found himself in a similar predicament, using a jar of clay to illustrate the emotions he endured, 2 Corinthians 4:7-9.   C.S. Lewis referred to life as a car in Mere Christianity, trying to run on something other than petroleum, eventually breaking down since individuals didn’t follow the directions left behind by God.  Before you get well, you must acknowledge that you can’t do it on your own, in need of a Savior to stitch you back together, John 3:16-17.

Behind childhood fairy tales like Humpty Dumpty lie painful truths.  Solomon highlights this in Ecclesiastes 4:10 as friends are designed to pick us up when we fall.  Without somebody to turn to, pity reigns on these poor souls.  Therefore, if you’re hanging by a thread, lying in pain and waiting to be helped up, cry out to Jesus and He will put you back together, Luke 23:42-43.

by Jay Mankus

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Bouncing Back

Posted on February 15, 2014 by expressyourself4him

Super balls, the toy, not the lottery game were always fascinating to me.  If you were in a gym or parking lot, it didn’t take much effort on one bounce to get a super ball to reach 50 feet high.  The rubber inside was perfectly designed to vault into the air, springing up and down for several seconds.  If only human beings could bounce back as quick as these specially designed balls.

The term bounce can either be a noun or verb depending upon your use.  Webster uses a noun when referencing jumping, moving up and down or rebounding an object that has taken a bad bounce.  Meanwhile, a verb is the actually act like bouncing a basketball or rebounding from a fall.  The greatest Olympic example of this is a ski jumper who falls at the end of the ramp, wiping out, falling end over end down a steep hill, crashing and sliding into several different objects along the way.  ABC Sports titled this moment, “the Agony of Defeat,” replaying it each week as a promotional for The Wide World of Sports.

If my kids could have created a video of my 5 second fall during my tubing accident, I might have over 1 million hits on my you tube channel.  However, my initial concern is trying to swallow my pride, get healthy and make a quick recovery.  I am more embarrassed than anything, kicking myself for wasting my personal time from work during this 2 week period.  Despite everything that happened, I still have my life, the ability to walk and my breathing improves daily.  If you’re feeling down today, use the prayer in Colossians 3:23 to bounce back as you rebound from a fall in life.

by Jay Mankus

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On the Other Side of the Street

Posted on February 11, 2014 by expressyourself4him

One of the cliches I heard way too often growing up was, “if the shoe fits wear it.”  I’m still not exactly sure where this phrase originated or what it’s intended purpose served, yet I have learned to distinguish my strengths from my weaknesses over time.  When it comes to death, dying, injuries and wheelchairs, I’m at a loss, leaving me uncomfortable and unqualified to handle these environments.

Perhaps, this may explain why God forced me to visit the other side of the street last week.  When you reach a certain age, suffer a debilitating  injury or endure an accident, these individuals all share something in common, they are helpless.  As you enter this arena, self sufficiency is no longer an option with souls needing another person to help them up, take their hand and nurture them back to health.  Normally a quick healer, this is mostly foreign to me except for a few broken bones here and a surgery there.

In biblical times, there were no nursing homes or retirement centers to spend your final years on earth.  Your destiny was determined by your family, their generosity and wealth necessary to provide affordable care.  As the modern family dissolves into some type of dysfunctional reality television show, its no wonder that the amount of beggars and homeless continue to increase, showing up at most busy intersections where I live.  Abandoned by their families, friends and employers, these desperate people are like prodigal sons and daughters waiting for their father to welcome them back home.  Until this day, those living on the other side of the street which need prayers, support and a helping hand to get them back on the road to recovery.

by Jay Mankus

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Why The World Is “Full of It.”

Posted on August 21, 2013 by expressyourself4him

As a child, my father regularly used the expression “you’re full of it!” Whenever anyone in my house appeared to bend the truth, exaggerate a little or attempt to tell a whopper of a lie, he confronted them with these words.  While not 100% perfect, most of his inclinations were spot on, as one by one, my sisters and I were guilty as charged.  When you peal back the pages of history, this web of deception rises to the surface.

In the beginning, Satan introduced the world to questioning authority in Genesis 3:1.  Moments later, Eve taught individuals to be curious, going beyond the boundaries established by God, Genesis 2:16-17.  Adam modeled blaming others instead of taking responsibility for your actions, Genesis 3:12.  If this wasn’t enough, Cain illustrated denial in Genesis 4:9, Abraham mastered trusting in yourself instead of God (Genesis 12:10-13 & 20:1-2) and this nature was past on to his son Isaac in Genesis 26:7, grand children and so on.  Like catching a common cold, the sin of lying has become air born, influencing the hearts and minds of mankind, Romans 3:23.

Today, you can turn on any cable news network, then wait for someone to mislead a commentator, journalist or reporter.  At a moment’s notice, a politician will dodge a question, answer the part they want to and move on without any consequences.  Professional athletes like Lance Armstrong, A-rod and others in the future will hold a press conference, deny accusations only to be proven guilty later on.  It’s time for the world to come out of the closet and confess, “we’re full of sin!”  Only then, can you move on to the healing process, James 5:16.  May these words strike a cord, Hebrews 4:12, helping habitual liars make their way toward the road to recovery through Christ the Lord, Romans 7:24-25.

by Jay Mankus

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Bent But Not Broken

Posted on May 28, 2013 by expressyourself4him

From a biblical perspective, bent refers to someone who goes off in a different direction, beyond the boundaries set by the Word of God.  Instead of staying on the straight and narrow, individuals stray onto the interstates of life, Matthew 7:13.  As a result, minds become bent out of shape, leaving crooked choices and twisted thoughts along this road.

Fortunately, God has left a map for the lost in the form of the Bible.  This summary of history helps individuals learn from past mistakes that Israel and other followers made, 1 Corinthians 10:1-6.  Like an addict on the road to recovery, being straightened out can be a long and grueling ordeal.  Psalm 106:43 recounts how Israel was bent on rebellion despite being delivered by God time after time.

The first step toward revitalization is acknowledging your sin, James 5:16.  Once you reach this point, the Psalmist urges believers to cry out to the Lord, Psalm 106:44-45.  While all fall short of God’s glory, Romans 3:23, Jesus was sent to die on our behalf, settling the debt we had accrued.  Thus, despite being bent further than you initially planned, God’s promises have kept people from complete brokenness, Psalm 34:18.  Where there is a will, there is a way back to the narrow path, Matthew 7:14.

by Jay Mankus

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