Tag Archives: working as a team

When Two Become One Flesh

When I try to imagine two people becoming one flesh, the best analogy I can come up with is a three-legged race. The last time I participated in one of these was at a church picnic. Two individuals have their middle legs tied together, forced to work as a team. The most successful couples get into a rhythm, communicating as one flesh to outpace all of their opponents.

Then Adam said, This [creature] is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of a man. 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall become united and cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not embarrassed or ashamed in each other’s presence, Genesis 2:23-25.

Moses explains the origin of marriage in the passage above. Since God created Eve out of pieces from man’s body, Adam is blown away by what has just taken place. While modern day couples may hold hands in public, when newlyweds have intercourse, they become one flesh. Unfortunately, many couples focus on the sexual aspect of marriage rather than communication.

Everything is permissible (allowable and lawful) for me; but not all things are helpful (good for me to do, expedient and profitable when considered with other things). Everything is lawful for me, but I will not become the slave of anything or be brought under its power. 13 Food [is intended] for the stomach and the stomach for food, but God will finally end [the functions of] both and bring them to nothing. The body is not intended for sexual immorality, but [is intended] for the Lord, and the Lord [is intended] for the body [[a]to save, sanctify, and raise it again]. 14 And God both raised the Lord to life and will also raise us up by His power. 15 Do you not see and know that your bodies are members (bodily parts) of Christ (the Messiah)? Am I therefore to take the parts of Christ and make [them] parts of a prostitute? Never! Never! 16 Or do you not know and realize that when a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? The two, it is written, shall become one flesh. 17 But the person who is united to the Lord becomes one spirit with Him, 1 Corinthians 6:12-17.

The apostle Paul interjects how free will influences relationships in the above passage. The key phrase is Paul’s first century later comes in the form, “not every choice is beneficial.” When two people enter into the covenant of marriage, it takes time to transition from living for yourself to pleasing your soulmate. Sacrifices will have to be made by each person. If success is the process of arriving, when two individuals become one flesh, this journey takes a lifetime to grow closer as one.

by Jay Mankus

Its Always Better When We Work Together

At the moment you enter this world from your mother’s womb, human nature causes a new born to cry out.  Whether this is out of hunger for food, frustration or a sign of a dirty diaper, selfish natures don’t hide very long.  Perhaps this may explain why its hard for married couples to put aside childish ways as they attempt to become one flesh.  Those marriages that fail can blame individuals who continue to work alone, unable to yield to a team concept.  In an ideal setting, its always better when you work together with your soul mate.

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh, Genesis 2:24.

There is a scene in the 2017 film the Shack which illustrates this point.  Mackenzie Allen Phillips played by Sam Worthington has a near death experience where he spends a weekend with God and Jesus.  Following the tragedy of his daughter’s death, Mack spirals into a deep depression as well as developing bitterness within his heart toward God.  During a series a conversations, Mack begins to come to grips with his flawed mindset.  Like a disciple trained by Jesus, Mack is a slow learner, struggling to place his faith in God.  After walking on water with Jesus’ help, Mack tries this on his own, sinking to the bottom.  Laughing initially at Mack’s surprise, Jesus turns to him replying, “Its always better when we do it together.”

Two are better than one because they have a more satisfying return for their labor; 10 for if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and does not have another to lift him up, Ecclesiastes 4:9-10.

One of the wisest men to walk the face of the earth stresses the importance of a soulmate.  Sure, not everyone is meant to become married, electing to remain single to follow their dreams.  Yet, when couples work together as a team, joy, satisfaction and peace is found.  After watching the Shack I felt compelled to consider how I can become a better teammate with my wife.  When my wife Leanne and I first got married, each of us thought we would spend years serving in youth ministry together.  Nearly 25 years later, its time to figure out how my wife can become a part of my blog Express Yourself 4Him.  Although I’m not sure the role Leanne will eventually play, marriage is always better when you work together.

by Jay Mankus